Brandi

186 posts

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Brandi

Brandi

@BFF

I'm bear. Mother of 1 crazy daughter Interrupting enthusiast. Proud owner of underwear with holes in them.

The Crick (San Fran Bay Area) Katılım Ekim 2009
98 Takip Edilen1.5K Takipçiler
Brandi
Brandi@BFF·
No pomegranates. No no no no no pomegranates.
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Patton Oswalt
Patton Oswalt@pattonoswalt·
THE RAISINS. ARE STAYING. IN. THE POTATO SALAD.
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Nikki Glaser
Nikki Glaser@NikkiGlaser·
My ultimate fantasy is telling a stranger, “you need to wear a mask” and as they go off about fake news and hoaxes, I say “oh no, I’m sorry, it’s because you’re ugly.”
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Stephen King
Stephen King@StephenKing·
Probably someone else already posted this, it's on the web, but after all the shitty, unpleasant, and frightening news lately, this warmed me up. Go ahead, call me a softy. I don't care.
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Brandi
Brandi@BFF·
Me too. Except I'm not an amazingly beautiful comedian. Oh well maybe next year.
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Philz
Philz@RyanPhillippe·
stop sending me this
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Brandi
Brandi@BFF·
Idea for a maternity shirt: Irresponsible ejaculation written over the baby bump
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Rutger Bregman
Rutger Bregman@rcbregman·
Getting bombarbed with emails from producers and directors inquiring about the film rights of this story. I'm so glad the 'boys' from The Real Lord of the Flies are finally, after 50 years, getting the attention they deserve. theguardian.com/books/2020/may…
Rutger Bregman tweet media
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Brandi
Brandi@BFF·
@HeidiNCloset Here's to you keeping your OG name. I for 1 think its amazing and original. The other names are nice but so blah. U B U!
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