Uhhhhhhh

Do not understand the public’s current obsession with truffle everything. Yeah let me get $15 “truffle fries” that taste worse than regular fries. It insists upon itself.

Mrs. Met is Puerto Rican and Jewish, grew up in Woodside, worked at a bakery as a teen and went to a large public HS whereas Mr. Met is canonically Irish and Italian, grew up in Ozone Park and went to multiple Catholic schools, it's wild some of you are trying to debate this

Sneaking out of my son’s school play to drink with the lads

Hayao Miyazaki: I need a normal man to animate a normal beam and a normal explosion. Hideaki Anno: Sir, I’m 23 years old and I’m insane. What if the beam and explosion were absolutely unreal instead of normal?

Time for my favorite holiday movie. It’s a Wonderful Chungus Life

Thank God Curtis Sliwa lost the NYC election. We’d all be living under Shilelagh Law. youtu.be/9POSq7qJ5Oc?si…

This was unscripted

Can’t wait to eat lab grown meat and get meat-sothelioma

Jane Goodall? More like Jane Badnone

Me when Im bout to sing a song

Sneakers O’Toole was so right when he said “I’m taking my sneakers off. I am Sneakers O’Toole”. I got new sneakers and I’m feeling the same kinda way

Finally saw Phantom of the Opera last night and I am speechless. My favorite part of is when he’s at the opera and he says “It’s Phantom Time”. I was floored.

This would lowkey be such a vibe killer

No bond is more scared than that between a man and his jaundice Seinfeld t-shirt from five below

WARNING: Jumpscare

I can’t get over this picture of Babe Ruth on vacation in Florida. It looks like the ending of the Lorax