Devon.Schmevon

Instead of conjunctivitis, why not call it duct, duct, goo? #Eyellbehereallweek

@SaturnSquiggles It really was :)

@Devon_Schmevon Oh that’s so lovely!!

My son and I were up until 3 am last night, talking and eating Pepperidge straight out of the packet. I woke up exhausted but wouldn't have it any other way. #family #motherhood #snacks #memories #nonbinarymom

I'm starting to see why the women in my family have been single for decades.

There is a lizard on my bed. I plan to lure my teenager in here using Pocky as bait, and he'll come thanks to the years of trust I've built for this very moment. He's much smaller and easier to digest.