Mike Rea

Yeah, I know this is engagement bait bullshit from a European with no clue, but I see this kinda RETURN TO FARM post on X all the time, and it's always some idylic dreamscape of rural niceness, which makes it really fucking obvious to all of us who come from farming backgrounds that these people have zero fucking clue, and would probably end up wrapped around an auger on their first day. News flash. Farming is HARD. What these people are imagining is rural living on a big plot of land, where they've got income from something else, and maybe a couple of animals to keep down the grass and a little garden on the side. That's what I do now that I'm a rich guy. It's pretty awesome. I also know that if I had to make a living off this land I could probably do it (because unlike these weenies, I know how) but I don't want to, because it would absolutely fucking suck. Because in reality making a living off being a farmer is brutal. It's nonstop backbreaking labor where everything that can go wrong, will. And it will go wrong at absolutely the worst possible time. (especially if cows are involved!) Modern squishy internet people do not even sorta comprehend how hard farming is. I worked on dairy farms. I can't speak for the dirt farmers but I'm sure they've got their own set of wacky nonsense they get to put up with. It is LONG hours. I once did a stint opening up a new dairy where I worked 72 hours straight, with a couple of thirty minute naps in a truck or on the barn floor snuck in. There's nothing quite as fun as dealing with fifteen hundred pound animals and dangerous heavy equipment when you're so tired you're starting to see things that aren't there. Oh, and you'd better get real comfortable with blood, shit, piss, and death. Dealing with lots of farm animals is not for the squeamish. They're going to get sick, get injured, get stuck in infuriating and mysterious ways, and die stupidly on you. Every kind of livestock has got its peculiar way of being a pain in the ass. Cows are loveable, curious, stupid, and sometimes homicidal. I've been kicked, trampled, hooked, and smashed into/through fences. These sheltered idiot city people say crap like "go buy a farm" having zero comprehension of how much good farmland costs, or the insane costs of equipment, or livestock involved. If they saw what a good tractor cost they'd shit themselves. "Buy land"... Have you priced land? Oh, you can still buy cheap land, but it's usually cheap for a reason. As in you can't farm it, or it doesn't have water, or it's a nightmare hellscape of windy death. So farming is expensive to get into, hard to make a profit at, and insanely difficult the entire time. Oh yeah, and just when you think you've got it figured out, the government will absolutely fuck with you, because it's also super regulated. Yay. "skip the degree"... Lady, I got into college on an ag scholarship, and started out as an ag science major. Successful farmers are educated because this shit is complicated. (I then changed majors and got an accounting degree so I wouldn't have to pull calves at 3:00 AM, a decision which I have not regretted) These fuckers think farming is just strolling around in a sun dress picking wild flowers or some shit. Oh hell no. Farmers farm because they want to, and the juice is worth the squeeze for them.

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