Jayson Gaddis

Never, ever get married. Unless you are willing to do these 3 things.

Never fight over text or email. My wife and I made this a rule in our marriage and it’s helped keep our relationship awesome. Instead, say this: “I hear what you’re saying. Can we talk about this in person? Our relationship is too important to do it over text.”

Whew, been a while. Why do busy entreprenuers think that a 1 hr weekly meeting with their wife is good? Because they don't know any better.

When you say something dumb, inconsiderate, or hurtful, instead of defending or explaining, just ask for a re-do and say it in a more thoughtful, empathic, and considerate way.

Your triggers are demanding you become a bigger person. Instead of this being a burden, frame it as a call to action, a call to your soul to step deeper into your capacity as a relational being.

When you don't feel seen by the person closest to you, it should feel terrible. Respect those feelings and take action. Stop tolerating people who can't or won't understand or see you for who you really are.

Pro tip: Reaching out for help in a painful moment is a good idea. It can stop the bleeding so to speak. But as a long-term approach to get what you want, it's a bad idea because it's reactive, not proactive. Seek long term solutions where you change your own patterns.

Flawed thinking about partnerships: You think there's something wrong with you You think there's something wrong with them You fail to see all the growth opportunities for you personally

Other people will have a problem with your choices at times, but that's not a good enough reason to not hold firm in who you are.

Every day is an opportunity to hit reset. It can be easy to fall prey to negative thinking. Do your best to stand tall today. Get connected to at least one person. How? Get super raw and real with them. That will help you come back to yourself.

Finally, do you have a person in your life you can say this out loud to? If so, go share it.

2 important questions to ask yourself right now... 1) What do I like about me? Relax into the answer and feel it. Soak it in. 2) What don't I like about me? With this one, check in and see if you have goals around this that are attainable and realistic.

If you feel like you can't be you in your most important relationship, that is where your work is. It's the most important journey you'll ever make.

You must have at least 1 person in your life that has your back 100%. This means they don't just support you, but they challenge you. Of course, you also need to be this rock for at least one other person. Get this, create this, be this, strengthen this.

Two ways to deal with pain: 1) feel all of it 2) turn it into fuel. So, when feeling pain, feel it all the way down without getting lost in it. It's a skill. And pain as fuel will help orient you to not complain, whine, or drown in your pain. Let it motivate you to take action.

You deserve mutual relationships where they also reach out to you.

Notice if you are "chasing" some kind of connection with someone who's not really available. What does that say about you? Consider it a form of giving yourself away or trying too hard. Then, you might change your behavior.

I want to remind you that embedded in any relational pain is an opportunity. The big pains from your past can help fuel a brighter future, and even a soul's purpose. The small pains from yesterday are opportunities for repair and understanding.

Remember that no matter how bad it gets or how stressed or overwhelmed you are, you are a good person.

The danger in not speaking up is that you leave yourself behind. This creates an inner conflict and builds resentment.

Don't forget, when you avoid conflict, you're creating a conflict inside of you.