Jim Breuer

If you haven't already, secure your tickets to the Find the Funny Tour. jimbreuer.com/tour These are the only dates for Stand Up that I will be doing in 2026. You won't want to miss this.

They say ‘one nation under God’ but never define which one. That’s the trick.

We traded God and family for money and power and wonder why nothing feels right.

You’re way more powerful sober. That’s exactly why the bottle keeps calling you back.

They sell us hate disguised as patriotism and we keep buying it.

Same gas prices, no stickers. Funny how the outrage only works in one direction.

Your heroes aren't who you think they are. God has a funny way of showing you that.

The older I get, the less I need. Some call it boring. I call it peace.

They feed you the emotion and you think it's yours. That's the trick.

We're all on borrowed time. Spend it like you know that.

Jim Breuer Live 4-28-2026 x.com/i/broadcasts/1…

Put regular people in a room and they'll figure it out. That's exactly why they'll never let it happen.

Chaos only exists in your world because you keep letting it in.

Africa reminds you what connection actually feels like when all the noise is gone.

Some of these people don't even look like the same person anymore. And I'm not the only one noticing.

Anxiety only exists because you're trying to control something that was never yours to control.

The power to heal, inspire, and conquer is already inside you. That's what they don't want you to know.

Be present. You’ll never watch that video anyway.

Watch Long Live Paint animated on YouTube now!

The less noise I let in, the more I hear what actually matters.