Max Fleischhacker

Went paint balling for the first time and got hit in the neck in the first round

ever since i was a little kid i knew that i wanted to be late for work

When people say "Sensitive Young Man" they are referring to this

Chuck Norris did give us that Walker Texas Ranger lever on Late Night with Conan

[going into any work meeting] Well, I guess this is it. They’re finally going to kill me. And why not,

those aren’t the fucking words.

"you gotta play with the cards you're dealt" WRONG. i play pot of greed which lets me draw two additional cards from my deck

not now bro i’m accepting things i cannot change

Being asked about Timothée Chalamet’s recent comments by less pop culture-obsessed friends and family

Timothée's filmography really has something for everybody. The girls (little women) the gays (cmbyn) the ones still figuring it out (bones and all) the boys (marty supreme) the men (dune) the kids (wonka) and even the elders (a complete unknown)

El trailer de la nueva de Spiderman arranca con Peter viendo a su ex en un video diciendo que esta en el mejor momento de su vida y despues de esto se tira de cabeza desde una terraza ya esta gran película.

My wife isn’t on dating apps my wife will be at the IMAX dune triple feature

100 percent disagree. One of the great film making achievements. Warren Beatty is one of the best directors of the last 50 years. This is a beautifully made film on every level with one of the great Diane Keaton performances. Any person wanting to make a love story that is both small and epic should watch this. In this era of shorter attention spans REDS stands out as what long form storytelling used to be. This used to be what a big screen movie was with our IMAX or special effects - and it is breathtaking. The witnesses alone - real people from the era telling the story interspersed with the films scenes give of a depth and authenticity we never see anymore in studio movies. See REDS!!

not to sounds like a slut but oh boy it would be soo great to have a really long hug and reassurance

DUNE PART THREE

America, if you’re near an opera house, if you’re near a ballet studio, go inside and put your hand inside the donation bin for no reason!! Their money is your money.. as of right now!!

tired of the conversation about how timothée should pretend to be humble in order to win an oscar. i actually think he should get crazier

Ever since this 30 Rock joke 15 years ago I have been trying to come up with a celebrity-impersonator name as good as Edward James Almost. The closest I have come so far is Mary Elizabeth Instead

I am in awe of his ability to always put the stress in a place you would not expect