bon-bon ᰔ

is it a redflag for you that i am 5'3? 🥺

Core memory unlocked

my weirdest habit is that i rehearse conversations in my head before they happen not important ones. like... ordering coffee. i'll stand outside the cafe running through "can i get an iced latte" three times like i'm preparing for a job interview and then i get to the counter and still somehow mess it up 😭

i think guys stopped telling people what they actually like because every time they did someone made them feel weird about it like a grown man can't say he loves a video game or a movie or a song without someone going "seriously? that's what you're into?" so they just stop sharing. and then one day they realize they haven't talked about something they love in years because nobody made it feel safe enough to i don't want to be that person for anyone. if you're into something i want to hear about it, even if i don't understand it. especially if no one else asked tell me something you love that you stopped talking about 🥺

i wanted a dog my entire life. like ENTIRE life. i used to draw dogs in my notebooks at school and name them and write little stories about what we'd do together my parents never let me have one. "too much responsibility" "who's going to walk it" "you can barely take care of yourself" ...okay fair but i never stopped wanting one and when i finally moved out and had my own place i spent like 3 months just looking at adoption pages every night before bed. almost applied a hundred times but kept closing the tab because i thought... what if they're right? what if i can't do this? and then i saw thor and something just clicked. like okay, this is mine he's been with me for a while now and honestly? some days i feel like the worst dog mom in the world. like i didn't walk him enough or i forgot to buy his treats or i got too caught up in a game and realized he's been staring at me for an hour waiting to go outside 😭 but then he climbs into bed and puts his head on my lap and falls asleep like i'm the safest person in his world and i think... maybe i'm not so bad at this after all 🥺

i'm in that weird mood where i don't want anything sad but i also don't want anything too loud or intense i just want an anime that feels like being wrapped in a warm blanket at 2am with tea and rain outside the window something that makes your chest feel warm and your brain go quiet give me one anime that feels like a warm hug on a bad day 🥺

stood in line behind this woman at the grocery store today. her card got declined a few times and she was already starting to put some of her stuff back. it wasn't even anything expensive, just basics everyone else in line was just standing there annoyed and waiting i don't know why, i just felt like doing something kind. told the cashier i'll cover it, it was like $30-40. honestly it's not gonna break my bank, i just wanted to help she started thanking me and you could tell she was embarrassed, maybe even a little ashamed and honestly... i was too i'm not telling this to be like look at me i'm so great, i'm telling this because i wanted to remind some of you (and me too) that sometimes you can do something small and nice for someone else and it'll make YOU feel different too you don't have to save someone's life, you don't have to pay off someone's debt, just some small thing that makes both of your days a little better <3

my ideal friday night is ordering too much food and playing something cozy together until we both fall asleep on the couch pajamas and pizza and "one more round" until 3am and no plans and getting ready for two hours, no loud bar where you can't even hear each other i don't need expensive dates. i need someone who doesn't get bored of me when there's nothing to do 🤍 is that too simple or does that actually sound perfect?

it was just a comment but it's been in my head all day was gaming with a group tonight and this guy said "you're pretty good for a girl who probably only plays for attention" and everyone laughed and i just muted myself and kept playing but like... i've been playing since i was 12. this is literally the one thing that's mine. the one place where i thought it didn't matter what i looked like or what people assumed about me and one sentence just made me feel like a guest in my own hobby i don't play for attention. i play because it's the only time my brain goes quiet. but i guess that's not obvious when you're a girl with a face cam 🤍 is it always going to be like this or does it get easier?

someone needs to patch modern dating because the current meta is unplayable 😭 i keep getting these reels on my feed where girls teach other girls how to "keep him interested": - don't text back too fast - make him wait - act like you don't care - ever be the one who shows feelings first - the 3 month rule. the double texting rule. playing hard to get like it's a sport... their profiles it's literally hundreds of videos about how to manipulate someone into liking you and thousands of girls in the comments taking notes like this is a college course 🙈 and i'm just... you're not teaching girls how to find love, you're teaching them how to perform and then everyone's wondering why dating feels fake and why nobody trusts anyone anymore you want to know why guys feel like they're walking on eggshells? why they think one wrong message means getting ghosted? because someone on instagram told your girl that showing interest is a weakness i think the girls who are too busy learning "the rules" are losing the guys who just wanted something real 😔 honestly... are guys actually tired of this or have you just accepted it as normal at this point?

i do everything alone and most of the time it's fine i cook alone (badly). i game alone (loudly). i watch anime alone (crying). i walk thor alone (he walks me actually) and from the outside it probably looks like a cute cozy life. and it is. i'm not sad every second of every day but sometimes i'll pause my game and look at the empty side of the couch and think... this would be so much better if someone was sitting there. not even doing anything. just being there i don't need someone to fill my life. i just need someone to share it with 🥺 do you ever pause what you're doing and wish someone was just... there?🙈

the guy who texts "did you get home safe?" will always be more attractive to me than the guy who buys flowers quiet effort over loud gestures. every time 💞

spent 40 minutes trying to make pancakes. half of them look like continents. thor already ate two off the floor. we're calling this brunch 😭

@The_Dreamy1 thank you <3

@missingbonbon I thought you should know there's an imposter out there.

i feel like some of you take care of everyone around you and no one ever asks who takes care of you you're the one people call when they need help. the reliable one. the strong one. and you never complain because that's just who you are but sometimes you just want someone to look at you and say "you don't have to be strong right now. i've got you" if no one's said it to you today... i see you. and you deserve that person 🥺

@neil_van85983 it’s really hard being the giver all the time... i hope someone appreciates you soon 😔

@missingbonbon You hit the nail on the head!!! Everyone asks me for different things. And i never ask anyone for anything. Half the time i don't even get a thank you. I have no support. I don't half anyone ride or die for me. No "other half". I understand being lonely all too well.

@RandallAndrews1 noo don't say that... you are definitely not scrap metal pls be nice to yourself 🥺

@missingbonbon Yeah. I don’t get taken care of. I’m left as scrap metal in a garbage can

@DarkStormX2 haha your disguise didn't work on me... i see right through it

@missingbonbon Damn, who told you? I like to keep a low profile. I need to use a better disguise. 🤪

@SilentCodeRed wait those bears are so cute... sending you a big hug back 🥺

@missingbonbon You are right, you don’t have to be strong right now.

@LordRen235361 that’s a really heavy weight to carry alone... i’m sending you some strength 🥺

@missingbonbon Nobody but me takes care of me unfortunately.

@webber50281 taking turns being the strong one sounds perfect actually... deal

@missingbonbon I would love for you to take care of me. But just show you know, I would return the favor.