Emily A(cab) Gutoski

*scalds my throat with tea so I can’t feel it* Me: self care

Police be like “I see clear evidence you’re being harassed and stalked but we can’t do shit until the person actually attempts to kill you so wait for that and if you survive give us a call”

If only there had been anything about Rick & Morty as a show to warn us the creators might not have very positive attitudes towards women

Hmmm. I just had a bizarre experience, involving a global news organisation and a trillion dollar corporation. (I got caught in the middle, so... owch.) It’s not the sort of experience the people involved usually talk about in public… so I think I’ll talk about it in public. 🧵

It's funny that Republicans are finally able to rerun an election over and over again and yet they still can't win

I need a reverse Shark Tank where US oligarchs explain why they deserve billions of dollars while standing in front of 5 people living in poverty who work for them.

💀💀💀

speaker_vote_v6_FINAL_new2

If you live in the United States, here’s a fun fact: People in other countries much poorer than you have their own homes and free healthcare.

my parents at 30: whew, we weren't expecting to have a third kid and a new car this year, but I think we can swing it me at 30: I was not expecting to have to replace an extra lightbulb in my home this year and now financial ruin is upon me

@pieceofkay @MykeATL I second all of these! Seattle was so magical and not super expensive if you don’t want it to be. Getting a coffee and a pastry and walking around Pike Place could cure most of my ills.

@MykeATL Go to Salt Lake City and look at the Rocky Mountains. It's like they're closing in on you, but in a good way. Also, I love San Francisco, Seattle, Philly, and Chicago. I love cities.

I asked for travel recommendations and I guess most people assume I have a passport and money? Like I was thinking I’d get “Uhh Boise is kinda neat” but instead folks think I can go to like fuckin Greece and shit

@MykeATL Seriously, driving around Arizona looks like an old bugs bunny cartoon. The red rocks in Sedona in the fall are breathtaking, and they have Jeep tours as well as “spiritual vortex” tours that are kitschy and great. Also shout out to San Diego as a sick ass quick trip.

Blessed Yule and a Happy Solstice to all!! As we finish out the longest night of the year, let us cheers to longer days, shorter nights, and a new year with a flame to light the way. 🕯️🔥✨

@Twiggling YOU GOT HERE CUZ YOURE FUCKIN TALENTED 💞

It's honestly hilarious how every time a weirdly arbitrary change is made to Twitter, you can always trace it back to a recent moment when people made fun of Elon for something.

Yeahhhhhh, fuck that Hogwarts game

We recognize that many of our players play other video games. However, we will no longer allow Satisfactory players to play any other video games such as Minecraft, Goat Simulator, God of War, Runescape, Final Fantasy. Stray is okay though. Cute cat. Also the mouse game is okay.