Liam Streff

2.9K posts

Liam Streff

Liam Streff

@streffbuddy

There won’t be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness. So I got that goin’ for me, which is nice.

Des Moines Katılım Temmuz 2009
75 Takip Edilen40 Takipçiler
Liam Streff retweetledi
Alec Sulkin
Alec Sulkin@thesulk·
Believe me when I say your year does not require a recap.
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Simon Holland
Simon Holland@simoncholland·
At this point a new year feels a bit risky, what about getting a certified pre-owned year?
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Liam Streff retweetledi
Alec Sulkin
Alec Sulkin@thesulk·
Big day for the word “welp”.
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Liam Streff retweetledi
Last Week Tonight
Last Week Tonight@LastWeekTonight·
We will pay the U.S. government $701 a year to play this at naturalization ceremonies.
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Liam Streff retweetledi
Simon Holland
Simon Holland@simoncholland·
Heard a rival dad is planning to hand out king size candy bars for Halloween so now every trick or treater that comes to my house is getting a full rack of ribs.
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Liam Streff retweetledi
Shooter McGavin
Shooter McGavin@ShooterMcGavin·
This Caddyshack gopher baby costume is A+ creativity
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Liam Streff retweetledi
Simon Holland
Simon Holland@simoncholland·
Thanked a rival dad at the neighborhood chili cook off for making his mild so my kids could have some.
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Liam Streff retweetledi
Dooner 🇺🇸
Dooner 🇺🇸@TimothyDooner·
Holy sh*t, never realized how much Freebird needed bagpipes
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Liam Streff retweetledi
Simon Holland
Simon Holland@simoncholland·
Be right back, my wife is in the kitchen and I need to go stand in front of the cabinet she’s about to open.
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Liam Streff retweetledi
The Daily Show
The Daily Show@TheDailyShow·
Never give up on your dreams… unless literally every single person on earth is telling you to
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Liam Streff retweetledi
The Onion
The Onion@TheOnion·
Our Front Page:
The Onion tweet media
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Liam Streff retweetledi
The Daily Show
The Daily Show@TheDailyShow·
The DNC has announced its convention themes: MONDAY: Joe Biden Can Do 100 Pushups In 15 Minutes TUESDAY: Slideshow Of Joe Biden Wearing Aviators Between 2008 And 2013 WEDNESDAY: Obama Killed Bin Laden And Biden Was In The Photo THURSDAY: What If We Give Everyone Ice Cream
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Liam Streff retweetledi
Ben Carlson
Ben Carlson@awealthofcs·
After my mortgage payment, 401k/529/IRA contributions, my annual 6 week vacation to Europe, private school for the kids, 2nd home in the Hamptons, a handful of angel investments and country club membership I basically live paycheck-to-paycheck This economy is the worst
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Liam Streff retweetledi
Simon Holland
Simon Holland@simoncholland·
Mothers Day: Here are flowers and breakfast in bed, don’t lift a finger, it’s your day! Father’s Day: We thought it would be fun if you grilled everyone dinner, also here is a Home Depot gift card so you can finally hang those shelves.
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Liam Streff retweetledi
The Tonight Show
The Tonight Show@FallonTonight·
Trump fought the law and the law won.
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Liam Streff retweetledi
The Onion
The Onion@TheOnion·
Bankrupt Red Lobster Runs All-You-Can-Grab Copper Wiring Promotion bit.ly/3wyF0tH
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Liam Streff retweetledi
Simon Holland
Simon Holland@simoncholland·
Only a matter of time before my electric bill asks me to select a tip amount.
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