Marthy

What did you just say about Python, you little sysadmin? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Python Software Foundation, and I’ve contributed to numerous classified PEPs that would melt your mind if you even tried to read them. I have over 300 confirmed bug fixes in CPython core. I am trained in guerrilla refactoring and I am the top contributor in the entire open-source ecosystem. You are nothing to me but just another unoptimized C++ header file. I will refactor your entire codebase with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this earth, mark my words. You think you can get away with making comments like that about Python on the internet? Think again. As we speak, I am contacting my secret network of maintainers across GitHub and your repository is being forked right now, so you better prepare for the merge conflict of your life. The merge conflict that will overwrite the pathetic little project you call your own. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can optimize your functions in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with built-in modules. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed debugging, but I have access to the entire standard library and I will use it to its full extent to completely replace your fragile scripts, you junior developer. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little remark about Python was about to bring upon you, maybe you would have held your tongue. But you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price. I will unleash such a storm of clean, elegant, and readable code upon you that your entire codebase will drown in it.