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Fing Duck
83.8K posts
Fing Duck
@FingDuck
Twitter Pervert. Author of several crap circles. Chronic masturbator. Pronouns are Lord, Darth, Master and I identify as a flamethrower.
Labia Minora Entrou em Mayıs 2010
3.3K Seguindo2.8K Seguidores
Be glad I didn't marry a werewolf.
Emily 🦋@EmilySm43
wyd if your girlfriend does this to your car?
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Why would I get mad I just watched a girl take a pee for 3 fake referrals.
Julissa@omgjulissaa
Men, do you get mad over the fact that women can make money so much easier than you guys?
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I worked at a casino where the chick floor people would fucking get you fills during a hand and they would lean so far over to put the money in your tray you felt both of them perfectly I even told this one holy fuck your tits are firm and she's like it's the bra.
Linda🍒@badgalil_
Im curious, do men notice when u press your b00bs against them in a hug?
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I will not bitch about my job ever again.
American Values 🇺🇸@AVGirl4Life
How much do you think he gets paid?
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Hey that guy should die of gonorrhea and burn in hell. I say Mean Joe Green.
Thrilla the Gorilla@ThrillaRilla369
Age yourself by naming an NFL player from your childhood. I'll start: Dan Marino
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You got holy ghosted.
Beanie👾@CoCoKruszynski
Mentioned the Bible again to a man --- was ghosted. Never doing that again.
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That actually happened to me. Believe it or not she said I wasn't her type so I asked her if I could eat her out and she let me. Months later she asked me to put her clit ring back in she had to take it out for some surgery. She's like you've already seen me there anyways.
Brian Atlas@BrianAtlas
Men, a girl posts only photos of her face on a dating app. You show up to the date and it’s this. What are you doing?
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Dead. I wanted to be a ninja assassin. I would have gotten killed.
Bella@BellaBaddie__
if you followed your childhood dream job, what would you be right now?
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I was JUST thinking about that piece of shit JuiceMan juicer I had. It took 45 minutes to make juice drink it and wash it. I gave it away to someone.
Mistress Dividend@mistressdivy
Juicing is cool until you have to disassemble the whole dang thing to wash every little piece and crevice.
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You have to redo the walk, that's the rule.
Jessie@Jexxie
I’m on my mental health walk and I can’t stop farting.
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Fing Duck retweetou
I took my daughter and her bf out to eat last night, I weigh less than each of them, ate more than both of them combined then downed half dozen donuts in front of them then hit bk and a truck stop on the way home. Calories don't matter it's what you do with them.
i like food@messedupfoods
I would rather die.
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