Kayla MacAskill

@laurenbonato Patch asked me for a pan. A freaking pan.

Calling all dads....what do you want for Christmas

My wife and I announce when we're going to the bathroom, but it's more a way of saying, "I'm not watching the kids, so if they die in the next 4 minutes it's all your fault."

@mrsmasshole I’ve been doing this for my whole adult life. I hope so.

If you eat cookies and watch a workout at the same time, do you burn calories? Asking for a friend...

Repeal the Massachusetts Flu Vaccine Mandate for School Attendence IMMEDIATELY. gopetition.com/petitions/repe…

@lmm414 Like did NO ONE ever play “it’s your birthday” for them. Tiny liars

They have to be joking right?

What a night to come back to Twitter. Greeted with an uneducated loser who wants 5 year olds to wear masks all day at school & some other stuff that if I said I’d be shunned. Back to insta we go.

Truly❤️

@CindyPerry6 @EJConvey @LouMerloni @WEEI @christianfauria Lady, are you drunk?

@steffmerloni Ask my dad... he seemed to track me just fine 🙄😂

Remember last week when we just wanted to keep each other healthy & safe, especially the front liners.... How things have turned. The human race is scary.

@Steeltekki @CrateandBarrel Good luck! Just hit 2 hours 🤦🏼‍♀️

I hate @CrateandBarrel ...when customer service is key, they failed. (Still on hold)

@LouMerloni if this isn’t you and mom, idk what is

If there's one thing I learned during this pandemic, it's that nearly everyone on Twitter dot com is a #COVID19 expert. Very impressive.

Patch has a hair flip going, and I don’t even hate it. I think I’ve lost it.

Guys, this news, @LouMerloni is unwell. Someone check in on him.

@rathergolftoday @IKEAUSA You win. ❤️❤️🤞🏼🤞🏼

Turning to twitter to get @IKEAUSA to freakingggg respond to me. Stop sucking at customer service when customer service is 100% all you can provide right now 🙃.. phone lines are “down” emails are “stopped” chat is “off” - soooo how do I get ahold of you?

Our guy @LouMerloni thinks MLB's investigation into the Red Sox was a crock of shit

@lmm414 Third times a charm? 😘

I just ordered Change The Date cards...with the wrong fucking date.