Luna Lovegood

I'm pushing on pull doors in buildings you've never heard of

You can excite a woman by showing her a wraparound porch or an extremely deep bathtub

i’m actually very chill once everything goes exactly how i planned

Our Congress can't open DHS, and they can't agree to not spy on Americans. But sending ~$500M to Israel, oh....gotta get that through. GTFO. Get them all out. We need a reset.

On tax day, remember that the federal government takes in more than $5 trillion/year, which is more than the GDP of every country on the planet (except the US itself and China). They still overspend by another $2 trillion. They refuse to address rampant waste, fraud and abuse.

If Persephone can be the Goddess of flowers and the Queen of Hell ,then you my dear can be full of whimsy and rage.

fuuuuck i just realized that the future idealized version of myself cant exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things. has anybody heard about this

I’m a millennial so my retirement plan is societal collapse

My HOA is two weeks away from developing a nuclear weapon

@Mappy6984 I’m a single woman and have the same crash outs. I guess this is why they call me the Dad of the friend group.

All dads have crashed out before

@DarrenC91694250 @On3 @PeteNakos Oh wow Darren can talk to ghosts

@LeftyLoveGood @On3 @PeteNakos You mom had the same expression when I told her also

BREAKING: Kentucky guard Collin Chandler has entered the NCAA Transfer Portal, @PeteNakos reports. on3.com/news/kentucky-…

@DarrenC91694250 @On3 @PeteNakos *shocked face*

@LeftyLoveGood @On3 @PeteNakos Im not married😂

@pbarlow1966 @On3 @PeteNakos They are funny. Thats why we keep making them.

@LeftyLoveGood @On3 @PeteNakos Soaking jokes about BYU. Always as funny as they original. . .

@DarrenC91694250 @On3 @PeteNakos It’s even more hilarious because she learned from your wife

@LeftyLoveGood @On3 @PeteNakos Thats funny thats what they called your mom

@On3 @PeteNakos I am cute and my brains are very much intact. While your response is not cute and your rudeness is on display for all to see!

@On3 @PeteNakos They’re not going to be able to call him the super soaker at BYU because the school will suspend them.

@On3 @PeteNakos …and we still called his super soaker this year…

Explaining to my boss I can’t check emails because I’m trying to limit my screen time

Loving your country should never be synonymous with loving your government.

throwing trash out your window while driving automatically puts you at the bottom of the totem pole for humanity ultimate loser behavior