Undecided

//me when i have inspiration for a character but have to pray no one executes me for throwing varka in the fucking dumpster 😭

@shadowsheir29 //i just wanna freely write angst without having to worry about every single aspect, ya know?

@lostwolfofmond //DO WHAT YOU WANT OOMF IF YOU HAVE NO SUPPORTERS I AM DEAD !!!! also on a serious note i love all the stuff you do with ur rps but if it makes you unhappy then you should be able to change it if you want !! at the end of the day its all fiction. and if anyone is rude i will kill

//tbf im bored with a lot of things rn i wanna just be free to write whatever and not have to worry about what's canon or what other people think like i enjoy writing certain things but i start feeling guilty because people get tired of those certain things

@sinfulmicrowave //i just don't want people to hate me for doing something extreme with a character they really like or are really attached to because i had plans for a certain character but feel too guilty and like it would fuck up too much shit if i went with the thing i WANT to do

@lostwolfofmond //spit your shit, king. feed us the most gut wretching angst you got if that's what you're feeling 🙏

//and again, i love ships, as long as the vibes are there!! but sometimes they're just not. and i miss angst for the sake of angst! its what im best at and what i truly love idk im just bitching about nothing again I'll forget this tomorrow

//like im horrible at comfort, fluff i very rarely TRULY enjoy unless the chemistry is working, and im not writing straight up nsfw so i feel out of place there because i miss out on stuff i love writing shipping stuff too but nowadays it feels like thats ALL i can write

//idk what the fuck to do with varka im ngl im just bored of him before i even started

I miss my kids, but they're grown up now, and they have eachother... I just hope they'll forgive me for leaving.

⠀i’m heavy with the weight of missing you , my dear.

I'll have to avoid the city to make sure no one recognises me.. The General Mahamatra's daughter is friends with Amber so more than likely, they'd send word back to Mond if they saw me wandering around Sumeru City.

i said i felt nothing, but that wasn't true. the truth was, from the moment i woke up, i would feel a swirling cacophony of emotion. but it was easier to sweep them up in a pile and store them away instead of processing every piece.

cw // spoiler-ish for Lohen's Story Quest "Once, there were three spirited young men who imagined their future together." #varka #crepus #eroch

i look for a picture of you to keep in my pocket， but i can't seem to find one where you look how i remember.

'in another life'， but why not this one? why not now?

@scientistasriel Might I ask who you are? Forgive my curiosity

@lostwolfofmond Hmmm… if you say so!

The cheap alcohol from Fontaine is disgusting but it'll do the trick. The fruity stuff is oddly deceiving, it tastes like juice but its almost entirely alcohol

@scientistasriel Ah, just call me Varka! I'm just a wandering old man, nothing important really

@lostwolfofmond Hmmm oki! Who are you btw?

@scientistasriel Deceptively so, yes... You'd never know it had this much alcohol in it

@lostwolfofmond Is it sweet at least?

@entwinedstrings It isn't thatttt sad, I'm just tryna conserve, you know!

@lostwolfofmond this is sad to witness

@SegmentEta Haha, alright! I look forward to it then, when I finally get to Snezhnaya!

@lostwolfofmond Ahaha, I like the way you think! I think a bright cake will be in order for us. Paired with a flavored vodka that's actually smoother than you think... Then, we can talk about whatever. I'm quite an open person, all things considered~

@SegmentEta Eta.. Not a very common name, eh? Fitting for someone who's kindness is also pretty uncommon, I'd say!

@lostwolfofmond Mm, sorry for that, Varka. Call me Eta in the future as well! I'm looking forward to whenever you visit.