Robert “The Undertaker” Bigsby

Thanks a lot you terrorist. Just lost my mortgage, wife, and kids because you decided to fuck around on the last few holes. New least favorite golfer on tour

Hearing reports that it’s going to be the Irishman taking it home today. Bartender just colossally fucked up by the way #lank

Woke up hammered with a busted 3 laying next to me on a twin sized blow up mattress and now I’m staring at pitcher number 4 with intent to accelerate quickly. Does it get any better?? #box #beer

14-0 ratio, no speaker, conversation being absolutely carried by some ball talk. Does it get better?? #ballknowledge

Just some white boys sipping on peppermint martinis. Questions? Comments? Concerns? Or may we proceed #ThirstyThirsday

@CallowayWarren1 Warren, Knew that belly was gonna become an issue at some point. Stay away from the carbs and stick to the titos and vodkas today Regards, Rob

one too many beers, maybe my wife was right about my weight… #TheDifference

Now who the hell decided it was a good idea to let women announce sporting events. This bitch announcing the Players makes me want to kill myself #DEI #womeninmenfields

Any other white boys taking advantage of a beautiful white boy Wednesday ???? #dontletusgethot #ridethestreak

10 men on a boat = 0 towels 0 sunscreen 0 water infinite beer, let a couple white boys enjoy day #whiteprivilege

Finally a trade that makes sense. One of the best talents in the league. Easily the best IQ, work ethic, and someone you wouldn’t mind dating your daughter. This is something I can surely get behind #whiteboysummer #justice

Going out with my friend who has ordered a plain burger for the 100th time in a row. Grow up and throw a slice of cheese on there idiot. #whiteboy #uncultured #gotohell

One letter away from doing something real special here. Unfortunately fell short and ended up being a character from a cartoon instead of the most productive field equipment of all time. #auction #letsbringthemback

@judeerickson123 Unbelievable stuff from McDouble, get your shit together before I go pay another visit to your mother

@Bigfudgefergy I left Sarah 2 years ago so for all I care spread that bitch open like Red Sea. Best, Rob

@robmclovin124 Hey Rob, Shut your stupid fucking mouth before I fuck your wife again. But I would love some recommendations. #tellsarahisayhi Pleasantries, Fudge

At a Cajun restaurant but my boys are telling me I can’t get the #frenchdip because it’s not seafood? Honestly I could giva singular fuck about their opinions. That dip from France is #gas and I want it inside of me. Also one of those jokers just spilled water all over me, unreal

There are some things you just can’t beat in life; Sun is shining, drinks are flowing, music is pumping. Only thing that could make this better would be the women shutting the fuck up #womeninmenfields #shutupslut

Throwback to ‘87 with one of my proudest accomplishments. Back when times were good, DUIs were just tickets, schools were separated, and my wife was still hot #TakeMeBackTuesday #beer #throwback

Updated Top 5: In no particular order -Driving home blitzed from the bar with Creed cranked to max volume -Pissing yourself when drunk -The sound of a zyn can cracking open before 9am -Taking a shot off Bonnie’s asshole -Sleeping in a full size bed with all your boys

Good to see the game trending back in the right direction. Need to keep more scrappy, high motor, pure athletes under center #lank #alllivesmatter

@judeerickson123 Absolutely Jude, Great point