Firefighter Humor

Why does cleaning the station toilets always make you have to poo??

Typical C shifters....

For all the tech rescuers out there: what’s your standard baseline PPE for extrication? I’m seeing FR gear, Dickies-style, or just long sleeves?

Nurses: super offended by what Senator said. Paramedics: Welcome to our world...

@jumpseatviews Blowies

Who’s catching jobs this week? #JumpseatNATION.

Dear kids pumping your arm to have us honk our horn as we drive by: We enjoy it just as much as you, never stop. Sincerely, The American Firefighter

Each FD has 3 types of shifts. One bonds over brotherhood, another bonds over bitching together, and the last enjoys their separation and time alone.

@FFHumor Properly functioning door remotes are like unicorns. Heard of them. Never seen one.

Is there such a thing as a FD with properly functions garage door remotes?

2018 statistics are in. Hurt feelings has trumped back injuries as the #1 workplace injuries in the fire service.

I’ll spend 1/3 of my life in this firehouse. 1/2 of that time will be spent cleaning up after and fixing the fuck ups of B shift

Why do we still put "Dial" 911 on trucks when no one would know how a dial phone works anymore? *Call* 911

@FFWisdom And enough recliners to go around, with respective outlets

For a fire department to function properly there has to be a mix of the enthusiasm of youth and the wisdom of age.

@EVPIsrael @gaza @FirehouseNews @FireChiefMag Nah, that’s Chicago

Whats Strange About This Picture? If you'r fighting fires caused by #FlamingKites launched by #Palestinian #Hamas #terrorists from @Gaza, were snipers regular take aim people near the border, you best have #Kevlar along with your usual #PPE! @FirehouseNews @FFHumor @FireChiefMag

I used to be an avid straight streamer... then I got an enlarged prostate.

I think our firehouse needs one! facebook.com/story.php?stor…

Firefighting is like sex... you gotta get up in there to get the job done

First in, last out.... of the kitchen

Firehouse fridge: “no name = fair game”

Well I'll be a monkey's uncle.... Lit off like a Roman candle. Police tried to play firefighter and put it out.