Ihatemarkkelly!

@FistPunchX 😅😅😅

Good Wednesday Morning Fuckers 👊🏼

He quit texting during the learing period!

@jayroo69 Yeah i dd.🤣

Has anybody heard from Tampon Tim since this epic burn? Still must be licking his wounds🤣🤣🤣

@CanadianGrayMan @rebeccab898989 Now that's what everyone needs to hear. Everyone complains about whats going on in Canada. You're the first one that I've seen that's standing up. I wish you the best of luck. Stay strong

Today is the closing day for the Canadian Gun Grab. I am 100% certain we will be keeping our firearms, not only because we need them against this tyrannical government, but also from the criminals and jihadi terrorists that are trying to take over our country. Make no mistake, this is tyranny in the making, setting the stage for them to make more excuses to "keep you safe" or "It's for your safety". The government of Canada and all those that hate this country and it's people, can just fvck right off! We are keeping our guns.

@KimKatieUSA That is AWESOME. Great job libtards! I hope the mayor taxes them more so he can fix the roads. Come on mandummy tax them more. We are all cheering for you.😅😅

Bronx, NY: Bus drivers are now straight-up driving on the sidewalks and tearing them up because city officials refuse to fix the massive potholes. I love NY, right? 😂

😁😬

@SafetyNotorious Hello. I'm just wondering why we can no longer repost your posts. Doesn't that help you when we repost.

I am respecting Kristi Noem’s privacy. She’s been a good friend to MAGA and loyal to President Trump.

@alt_w_v_g @hersheyjoel1 Why would anyone buy a place with a hoa? Insane

Got a letter from the HOA yesterday Actual letter In an envelope With a stamp In 2026 The letter said my trash can was visible from the street for too long on collection day The fine is $50 I checked my Ring camera The truck came at 7:03am I brought the can in at 7:14am 11 minutes $50 That's $4.55 per minute of trash can visibility My therapist charges $250 an hour That's $4.17 per minute My trash can sitting in a driveway is now more expensive per minute than therapy I looked at the letter again It was signed by the HOA president Her name is Karen Of course it is I know this woman She lives four houses down She still has Christmas lights up It's March I know because I drive past them twice a day And because that's what I do I checked the HOA bylaws All 47 pages Section 4.2 says all exterior fixtures and lighting must be seasonal and removed within 30 days of the applicable holiday Her lights have been up for 97 days I went to the HOA meeting Tuesday night 7pm In a church basement Folding chairs Fruit platter that nobody touched Seven people showed up Four of them were on the board The other three were there to complain I was there to read My wife came with me She didn't want to But she said "if I don't come you'll end up on the news" I brought my legal pad Karen called the meeting to order She talked about community standards She talked about property values She talked about the importance of curb appeal From a woman whose Christmas lights are still blinking in March I raised my hand She said "we'll take questions at the end" I said "it's not a question. It's a point of order." She looked at me I opened my legal pad I said "Section 4.2 requires seasonal decorations to be removed within 30 days. Your Christmas lights have been up for 97 days. You fined me $50 for 11 minutes of trash can visibility on collection day while you've been in violation for over three months." The room was quiet One of the other three complainers said "he's right" The board members looked at each other Karen said "that's a separate issue" I said "it's the same bylaws" She said "we'll review it" I said "I already did. Page 12. Happy to share my highlights." My wife looked at the ceiling Some things never change Karen said "I think we should move on" I said "agreed. I'll move on when the Christmas lights do." Nobody laughed I wasn't joking I paid the $50 Because it's $50 and I'm not going to die on that hill But if the rules apply to me they apply to everyone So I filed a formal complaint about the lights With photos Timestamped Funny how surveillance works both ways The fine for seasonal decoration violations is $75 per occurrence She's been in violation for 67 days past the 30-day grace period I'll let her do the math Or I'll do it for her Because that's what I do Make common sense common again Plz fix. Thx. Sent from my iPhone

@Tablesalt13 @elonmusk @nikitabier Yeah but for how long?

Hey @elonmusk and @nikitabier really LOVING the auto-translate feature! I'm getting people from ALL over the world quote tweeting my Canada-related posts. Its a truly international square now!! Amazing!!

@SaltyGoat17 No they need to be their own independent country. They need to be independent. We should only recognize them as a independent country. And make the best trade deals possible. They are some good people in Alberta.

Alberta appears like they’re actually considering seceding from Canada. Y’all think Alberta would make a good 51st state if this actually happened?

Record monthly gas price increases courtesy of Trump's Iran war.

Pretty much sums it up! 👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻

@SGTWipper1Each Grunt menu is better!

MRE Menu 24 Southwest Style Beef and Black Beans Is it better hot or cold?

@el28722_elli EXACTLY!

Not by sane people. 😉😉😉

@MilaTexas51095 @red_chem_lite I had never heard of it. Thanks for letting me know. I had no idea.

@PMalone54079 @red_chem_lite It’s a store chain that helps other states when there are natural disasters.

What’s the best grocery store in America and where is it? Fun fact: H-E-B, Texas is the only correct answer

@CaptMarkKelly You treasonous pos.

The Navajo Nation Council is right. The SAVE Act would make it harder for Native Americans and millions of others to vote. Voting is a right, not a privilege. I'll always stand with tribes to protect the right to vote.

@CaptMarkKelly Women's history month. Let's not forget tis great hero. Free JARED LOUGHNER .

As Women’s History Month comes to an end, I want to recognize all the women who have served our country, from the Revolutionary War to today. Even when our country refused their help, they stepped up and served anyway. They’ll always be a part of America’s story.

@TrollingCanuck @cccpfd 🤣🤣🤣🤣

😂😂