Mamas

this or nothing

A woman who triggers your ego. Might actually be the one trying to heal it. Because she’s not reacting to the man you pretend to be. She’s responding to the man underneath the mask. And a truth like that either humbles a man. Or sends them running.

bring back 3 am “i know you sleep but” paragraphs #reallovers #yearning

Uber driver: *drops me off at the wrong location* Me (shy): "This is perfect"

A second elephant has hit the room

Me when someone tries to use beginner level manipulation on me

@SoftDom4you No no no I tried that already severely hungover - don’t recommend

@Real_KC1 Its called Goodys Powder and it exists

Why is there not snortable acetaminophen? I wanna take it and immediately feel relief.. I think taking it straight to the dome would be very beneficial.

My car was on E so I put $20 in now it’s on E+

Men love a smart and intelligent woman until she uses her brain to decode his behavior patterns and bullshit.

vyvanse just kicked in im about to Message Everyone I Know

😂 Damn my X follower count is dropping faster than Donald Trump’s approval ratings…

life isn’t about finding a boyfriend its about finding a guy to terrorise when ur drunk

2 weeks till ur sad i do not care about the weather you will be sad this summer

watching a man cook is probably #1 on the list for nonsexual things that turn me on/I’m attracted to.

Casa Amor will now reportedly be streamed directly into the main villa. “producers say they want maximum chaos, minimal peace”

Well in that case Zero can get the boom juice from the electric chair, too.

There's so much beauty in this stupid fucking ugly fucking piece of shit world

@nvial47 I think I’ve saw this but thought it was lemonade

@Real_KC1 They have one called faze up that’s mtn dew flavored but I’ve only seen it a few places

Ghost made a 7up flavor energy drink.. If they make a Mt Dew one just know imma die from a caffeine overdose.