rarted

Just tried to start my car with a breeze

Irish goodbye is underrated don't @ me

It's been scientifically proven

Backwards hats get you bitches

Douchebags get laid

Andrew Tate has been permanently banned from Hell

The ads on YouTube are worse than 9/11

@luvrboy5000 Where's my jet?

I only go to costco cuz da soda .69 cents and its 420 calories

Traditional holiday food has to be derived from shitty rationing recipes. I have nothing to back this up, but you're telling me it's a good idea to hard boil a bunch of eggs, take the yolks out & mash them up with mayonnaise and then put it back?? SOLID

This is new Taylor literally a week old I loved Taylor when I was like 12 and she came out with teardrops on my guitar. What's everyone's favorite dessert? If I could actually grow a piece of mustache, I would. I can actually say if Harry Styles could I like his music it's good.

@bialycoyote You are gay

I’m so grateful for my friends. They’re too good man

I tweet; therefore, I am.

Fucking stupid ass pizzas of shit. All you fucking stupid asses are pizzas of shit. Fucking stupid asses!!!!!d 🍕

@PackJonke The one on Secor doesn't anymore, but it literally used to turn black at night

Who remembers the black big boy on Secor

You ever think about how your tongue is a big piece of meat that fills your entire mouth, but you can't eat it????

@IckBaby You should eat some mushrooms

I have so many things bottled up that I wanna talk about that are sketching me out in my life and I just need to spew them hahaha going to laugh myself into a coma goodbye forever.

Local low cal calzone zone

I was on acid while looking at Bill Gates' dick

Hey guys in all seriousness I wanted to take this time to remind you to start bulking up and prepare for hibernation because winter is coming