Kepler 452-ᗜˬᗜ

new strawpage:: c3nd.straw.page

endless nameless

@thehorizon2b2t Like chemical rockets are straight up impossible in any practical method since their rocket equation basically cucks them unfathomably

@thehorizon2b2t Its not, they're fucked

curious would it be like physically impossible for any intelligent species living on kepler to launch a rocket into space? like its already barely possible to launch a rocket from earth so I imagine if gravity was just a little larger you'd be kinda fucked

Artemis 2 Chan

Tanya Degurechaff they dont tell you about

Hold My Hand remake of a Mayano Top Gun art I did last year to see if I had any improvement #umamusume #ウマ娘

The Dignity Act is mass amnesty and would constitute a terrible betrayal of our voters.

@ciivionx @fleshsimulator inadequate attempt at vector recreation, try again and be original this time please

"We can't deport people back to Haiti, look what the Haitians did to them! They're maniacs! They have to stay here"

Nick Fuentes fans trying to tell you that you're gay for watching anime after their leader was caught watching trans porn

@Memertiss @11975MHz They wont

@11975MHz Damn that sucks, hopefully the next generation of teachers are better

...we didn't. When I was in school, World History was on repeat about every two years. And every two years we focused almost entirely on three events: The Pilgrims landing at Plymouth, The American Revolutionary War, and the American Civil War. In my 2nd grade year, we spent at least two weeks of class time solely on Johnny Appleseed. That was in the 80s. Nowadays, American classrooms seem to be able to reach WWII when it comes to history, but they speedrun such history so that they can spend several weeks focused entirely on the Civil Rights Era and Emmitt Till. And what little they learned about WWII, they focused entirely on the Holocaust and Japanese-American Internment in the United States. You've probably noticed a trend here: their intent is to teach grievance at the expense of actual history. I spent some time a few years ago doing substitute teaching at high schools and I had a senior class of about 20 students, now young adults in final day of their history class. I was looking through their history textbook and was unsurprised to find that WWII barely got a few pages, and those few pages went on about the Holocaust and Japanese-American Internment. So I got to ask a few questions. "Raise your hand if you guys were taught any of these historical events. The Battle of Jutland." Quizzical looks. Zero hands. "The Battle of the Somme, or Verdun even." Zero hands. "The Battle of Midway." Two hands amble up. "The teacher you're covering for mentioned that one." Mentioned. Just mentioned. "Was Midway on any of your tests?" They responded: no. "The Holocaust?" Every hand shoots up. "Japanese-American Internment during WWII?" Every hand shoots up. "Taffy 3?" Again, quizzical looks. They likely think I'm talking about candy. "Emmitt Till?" Every hand shoots up. Our students graduating from high school here in the United States have little to no actual knowledge of the Pacific Theater. As far as they know, Pearl Harbor happened and then Japanese-American Internment and then somehow Hiroshima and Nagasaki. And only the ones who paid attention in class know this much that history.

What an absolutely beautifully drawn Lebel

They used synthetic diamonds to locate a specific heart beat over 40 miles away. I’m told it looked something like this:

I for one love what our mages at skunkworks dream up.

"Hey man, remember when you asked me to keep an eye out for a food delivery robot?" "Yeah?" "One's at the front door." "Damn. You didn't let it in, did you?" "What? No. Why would I—" "Good. That means we can hide." "Hide? Bro, you gotta pay for the $50 burrito whether you eat it or not." "Forget that. Help me barricade the entrance!" "Barricade the entrance?" "We can use my 50 lb commemorative bronze bust of staunch human supremacist, Bernie Sanders!" "Bro, just take the damn Klarna loan, like why are you—" "I didn't order no filthy burrito from no damn clanker!" "Oh." "That thing isn't delivering to me, it's here *for* me!" "Oh." "And I don't eat Chipotle anyway." "Yeah, I'm more of a Southwest Moe's man myself." "They suck too!" "Cap. The queso rips. But this does explain the text messages I've been getting." "Text messages?" BZZZT-BZZZT "Yeah, here's one now. Quote: Don't play dumb, meatbag. You were getting my texts just fine until you turned your phone off." "Er." "Really? You're ghosting the delivery bot?" "I figured it was spam text. From India." BZZZT-BZZZT "Uh huh. Well, the bot says you're gonna have to hop on a plane and fly your ass to Salia Sahi, cause these four wheels will follow you to the Gates of Hell itself." "See? I'm destined to be chased to the ends of the earth by a post-human intelligence as relentless as it is godless." "Dude, what did you do?" "Like a trilby-wearing Harry Potter fanfictionist, I always knew this day would come." "What?" "I exercised my God-given right and asserted my inherent human superiority over the wireborn abominations, that's what I did!" "Okay, well I don't know what any of that means or what it has to do with Harry Potter. Hell, I don't even know where or what Salia Sahi is." "That doesn't—" BZZZT-BZZZT "Oh. The bot says it's the largest slum in Bhubaneswar, the capital of Odisha, India—" "Is that really—" "—spanning over 256 acres and containing a population of over 100,000. Huh." "..." "Who knew?" "Who cares! We are under siege by a misaligned superintelligence beyond human ken and you're reciting #funslumfacts!" "I mean, it's just a cooler on four wheels." "Even so!" "And the only one under siege here is you, really, so—" "That's how it is, huh? Man's great enemy, the autonomous horde, is finally at the gate, and you *as a man* have no loyalty to spare for fellow flesh?" "Bro, the only flesh I care about *as a man* is the third-generation South Korean cutie I got coming over in thirty minutes, so I need Mr. Meals-on-Wheels-from-Hell out **there** out of **here** right **now**, cause I'm gonna crack, smash, and drill that fine ABG ass ALL night long!" "...well at least you have your priorities." BZZZT-BZZZT "Yeah so if you could take Humanity's Last Stand somewhere else that would be—huh?" "What?" "HA!" "What?!" "Bro!" "What is it? What did the clanker say now? What dark tenebrous designs churn in its misbegotten chthonic latent space?" "It says since I'm gonna be going Kellogg's Elf Mode on the Korean tonight, it's offering to bring me some gochujang-flavored Snap, Crackle, Pop for the post-coital reverie tomorrow morning." "...what." "No charge!" "I don't—" "This is my boy right here! I got no clue what you're beefin' with it for." "See? This is what I mean! My life is in danger and it's already won you over! ASI! ASI!" "Dude, I still don't know what any of this is about. Just tell me what happened." "That soulless, clinking, clattering Blasphemy against Man out there—" "Yeah, yeah, yeah." "—denigrated and impugned my higher, God-given promethean nature!" "See, again, that doesn't—wait how can something be God-given and promethean?" BZZZT-BZZZT "Okay, here we go. The delivery bot says it asked you to push a crosswalk button it couldn't reach and you didn't. Really?" "It tried to use me as a tool!" "Bro." "The machines serve our ends, not the other way around!" "Bro, come on." "I will not be de-evolved into a reverse centaur!" "I don't know what you're talkin' bout that magic pony shit for, bro. It's just general politeness." "My civility is reserved for the living! Should I start thanking every elevator and doorstop too?" "I get what you're saying bro, but actually, I've been on this Gratitude Equanimity Practice kick inspired by Jainism recently, and I gotta say—" BZZZT-BZZZT "What now?!" "The bot says you didn't just turn down its request. You also recorded the interaction as you danced in circles, singing, 'No arms! No arms! This clanker's got no arms!'" "That's—" "And then you uploaded it to TikTok." "That's an extremely biased account of what happened, bordering on pure fabrication." "And the Gram." "Fake News." BZZZT-BZZZT "It sent me the link. Wait, both links." "Don't—" "Looks like an accurate description to me." *No Arms! No arms!* "That could be AI-generated!" "And now you're bent over, slappin' your ass like a baboon." "I— "Just like last week, when you got shit-faced at Laura's party and we got kicked out—" "I was simply demonstrating something the Clanker can't do." "Be an asshole?" BZZZT-BZZZT "The bot says good one. Heh. Wait, how can it hear us from outside the apartment?" "It probably hacked your phone using a zero-day and is listening through the microphone." "What?" BZZZT-BZZZT "Oh. It says you're right. And it says it already pushed a fix with a white paper to GitHub." "Beware of Greeks bearing gifts." "Whatever, man. I think you should just apologize—" "Apologize?!" "—take down the video and let this whole thing go." "That's your answer, huh? I should start practicing my groveling now, hm?" "Bro." "In preparation for the inevitable day that I must prostrate myself before the Algorithmic Autarch!" "Bro, why is it always an escalation with you?" "And use my very tongue to clean the toes of the Digital Demiurge after it's trampled and bloodied the crushed flesh of man! That's what you'd both like to see, isn't it?!" "There you go with the feet shit again. That's why we got thrown out of Laura's party." BZZZT-BZZZT "For all we know, the bot could use another zero-day to overheat the lithium battery in your phone and turn it onto a Mossad-style bomb." "Eh..." "Turn it off!" "Actually, it sent a picture this time." "What? Let me see!" "Looks like your friend has arms and hands now." "What?! Who would—" "And the message reads: don't worry about the coming Machine God, you craven bag of biomass. Today we meet as equals." "I don't—" BZZZT-BZZZT "Oh, another one. It reads: Last Message. My batteries run on solar. I'm not going anywhere. My cameras are rolling and the whole world will watch your sniveling bitchborn meatbag butt come out here and catch these clanker hands. This isn't just an ass beating—it's Justice." "See! It's after me!" "Bro, I'm gonna level with you: you're a man right?" "Of course, I'm a man!" "Well, I already told you I got a girl coming, so I need you to do the proper thing." "Which is what?" "Man up, walk out there, and get clapped by the clanker." --- [g][title: Clanker Clapped]

I knew the photos would be good I knew they would enhance my perception of the universe and inspire me I still completely underestimated them

WHAT

THIS VIEW OF THE MOON FROM ARTEMIS II'S ORION HOLY HELLL!!!

What we do in life echoes in eternity.