Jessica

Plan for my future: 1. Start HRT 2. Start dating 3. Voice train 4. Save for FFS 5. Save for rhinoplasty 6. Save for shoulder reduction surgery 7. Learn how to do makeup 8. Get glasses 9. Get a better dress sense

I feel so dysphoric today, had to see my reflection when playing tennis with friends

Belh

@_JackBarnett @The_Bunny_Doll Nawr

@cat_moder @The_Bunny_Doll Log off girl

Oh my god you guys seem to think I just sit around on my ass all day and have this physique by magic, go study nutrition and actually eat a healthy diet, do daily exercise prioritising building leg muscles, cardio to stay trim and core exercises to give you a more defined stomach, take prog, make sure your E levels are consistently within the higher end of the female range, don't drink alcohol cus that fucks with your hormones, basically just live your life like some kind of transgender monk whose religion is the insane beauty standards we unfortunately have You say in one tweet how you want to be beautiful and nothing else other than that matters, and in another tweet you say you are "entitled" to being beautiful and that ugly people are subhuman in your eyes, you complain about being fat in a lot of your tweets, then actually try to change it? Losing weight is not impossible, being healthy isn't impossible, or maybe it is if you just spend all your time complaining about how life is so unfair on twitter Also I've been on HRT for literally a DECADE now, I know you're just gonna call me a "youngshit" but actually understand what I'm saying, you're comparing yourself to someone who has been on hormones for so much longer than you. Give it time, in ten years do you really think you're gonna look exactly the same as you do today? And PLEASE stop self-deprecating by calling yourself shit like "manmoder", "chopped troon", etc, you're only reinforcing negative beliefs about yourself, if you just spend your entire life feeling sorry for yourself and thinking you're disgusting, you're never gonna be able to see yourself as anything but that, have some self-respect, despite what you probably think, you are deserving of it, and it genuinely does break my heart to read that you've been following me since you were 13 and that you feel incredibly jaded and disenfranchised with being trans now :(

@boymoderology Is it a nice place to visit?

straight up londonmaxxing rn

@AwooWorldOrder @The_Bunny_Doll ?

@cat_moder @The_Bunny_Doll Stop being a melt, holy shit. Like I've tried to help people who doom as you do before, and they just end up dragging me off a mental cliff, trying to pull them out of the fire. If you love burning so much, fucking go for it, because these cries for help you're making won't work.

@puppymae_v @The_Bunny_Doll frfr

@cat_moder @The_Bunny_Doll counter point jessica, uhmmh you're a dipshit 🐶🖤~

@The_Bunny_Doll Hey sry, I didnt mean to diminish what youve gone through in anyway. And I wasnt trying to critisize you in anyway. Sorry about all this.

Yeah I'm so lucky that I was born into a conservative leaning working class family in one of the most deprived areas of the country. I'm so lucky that I had shitty parents who filled the house with nothing but junk food as I was growing up which eventually lead me to be classified as a medically obese child at 224lbs, but thanks to my amazing luck the weight just vanished, not like I exercise and make a conscious effort to be healthy, oh and having to pay for multiple excess skin removal operations wasn't cheap, nobody else gave me the money for those, I had to save it up myself. I'm so lucky that I became homeless at 16 with £200 in cash to my name and no bank account. I'm so lucky that I was forced to go through the NHS humiliation ritual where they expect you to present as your identified gender for a whole year before they even consider prescribing hormones, that was so much fun and definitely didn't leave a lasting impact on my mental state, I'm totally not in a constant state of anxiety about being clocked because I have firsthand experience with how shitty and subconsciously transphobic the average person on the street it. I'm so lucky that cus of my genetics I have very dark and coarse hair, I remember when I was a teen using an epilator on my face until it was blotchy and bleeding and I had to power through the pain while crying cus I hated my body so much, having to pay for 8 sessions of laser and more sessions of electrolysis than I can even remember wasn't cheap or fun either. I'm so lucky that I put my entire life on hold and missed out on so many opportunities because I was hyper focused on my transition. I'm so lucky that I benefited from nepotism, oh wait... my family never helped me at all with my transition, I had to save for pretty much every surgery myself. I'm so lucky that I have such crippling body dysmorphia and such an intense fear of transphobic abuse that I have rather embarrassingly dedicated my life to trying to achieve the ridiculous beauty standards and being able to live stealth, that's very fun and totally not a grueling existence! I'm so lucky that it took me around 11 years of waiting until I was finally able to get FFS, and I had to travel to the other side of the world by myself for the first time ever, and the last time I was abroad before that was when I was like 12 years old and being accompanied by my parents, yeah that was so fun, especially when I landed in America and was immediately detained in a security room while a bunch of border security agents interrogated me and looked through all my bags, totally didn't traumatise the fuck out of me. You guys can't bear to hear any of this because it completely dispels your stupid narrative that it was all luck and zero work, you're so obsessed with wanting to believe it was just luck so you can use it to absolve yourselves of any responsibility over your lives and act like bitter acrimonious doomers instead. You actually need to put the required work and effort into your own transitions instead of just leaving it all up to HRT and then giving up on life after two years when you aren't suddenly a 10/10 Instagram model.

@avE_tlA Not attacking her. Ive got nothing against her, was just saying that luck def played apart in her ability to go stealth. Im happy that she was lucky enough to bypass puberty.

why are you focused on attacking someone else over how they look instead of working on yourself in regards to your own insecurities and dysphoria. nobody else is going to make u feel better or solve these problems but U. screaming at her or anyone or calling ppl lucky is psycho

@parasite_eevee @The_Bunny_Doll Lol

@cat_moder @The_Bunny_Doll you gotta shut the fuck up and take the L on this one

@zoomerbread @The_Bunny_Doll No?

@cat_moder @The_Bunny_Doll did you stop reading after the first paragraph

@eileenslyr @The_Bunny_Doll Yes?

@cat_moder @The_Bunny_Doll did you read a single word of this tweet? jesus christ.

@AwooWorldOrder @The_Bunny_Doll Nah, Ive given up, my situation is hopeless in trying to ever pass

@cat_moder @The_Bunny_Doll Binning yourself off without even trying isn't righteous, dooming about a horrible situation you are unable to change. It's monging yourself off out of a lack of basic willpower and effort, and my honest-to-god manmoder male brained response is "stop fucking mincing".

@AwooWorldOrder @The_Bunny_Doll Well the reason I cant pass is due to the fact that I have hypermasucline features due to going through puberty

@cat_moder @The_Bunny_Doll Not to be catty as fuck, but when you hadn't even started HRT in Jan this year, there may in fact be a non luck-related reason why she passes, and you don't. Unrelated but they can do rhino at the same time as they do FFS

@lronKit @The_Bunny_Doll I mean lucky in terms of transitioning.

@cat_moder @The_Bunny_Doll jesus how unempathetic and self absorbed in your own misery can you be to say this shit to someone you dont know and whos clearly struggled much in her life

@stupidizicel Shes literally intersex and never went through puberty as well as being in hrt for like a decade and shes had surgeries. Dont conpare yourself to her shes like the luckiest trans person ever lol

@exoneratedcurl Your hair is rlly nice dw

Felt but less for the skin colour thing and more for the hair thing Why couldn't I have straight hair the vast VAST majority of my life problems were because of having black hair Hell even things like my lips just look ridiculous, I look like a white washed golliwog

@wifemaxxer @fatdumbchuf I dont think she had supportive parents

@fatdumbchuf Maybe I should just kill myself and hope that I get reincarnated as an intersex youngshit with supportive parents.

@The_Bunny_Doll You do have to admit that you did get insanely lucky tho