flappy 🐥

in case you haven't heard it today: - you matter - you are loved - your feathers are fluffy - your plumage is the perfect shade of yellow - you will one day pay homage to your ducky overlords - you are beautiful

@WhatsAGreenhorn @PopeAwesomeXIII 😍😍😍

@funflaps @PopeAwesomeXIII 🍇🍇

NEVER WASH YOUR DICKS ON A SUNDAY. Seriously guys pleeeeease don't make the mistake I did. It was sooooo peaceful this morning so I grabbed my bag of dicks from the mantlepiece, like you do. Inside, the dicks were slithering wetly, squirming like juicy fat worms who know it's not

William the Conqueror: Hey you, write your name and address in the Doomsday Book Peasant: The what book? William the Conqueror: I mean the Happy Book... The Happy Book of Cuddles

reconnecting with nature (banging my head against a large boulder)

Doctor Who: We can go ANYWHERE in time and space! Also Doctor Who: Let's go to Wales again

STOP is short for stop thinking of porn

Paul stabs his hooks into the giant sandworm, everybody cheers "YAY, HE'S A RIDER!" then another worm hears us and swallows us whole

inside you are two wolves. one is a duck. the other is a duck. they are both ducks and THEY WANT BREAD

Water. Earth. Fire. Air. These are the voyages of the Starship Enterprise, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound, putting things right that once went wrong and hoping each time that his next leap will be the leap home

BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM Never gonna BOOM BOOM BOOM Never gonna let BOOM BOOM Never gonna BOOM BOOM BOOM and BOOMBOOM BOOM (you've been baldrick-rolled)

so I keep hearing fan fiction is worth reading so I googled to find the most popular fan fics and ok I expected there'd be loads of erotica but omg is there anything with an ACTUAL STORY or is it ALL just "chose your favourite characters and make them fuck" in this essay I will

quack

if u are not yet a duck, try again ❤️

NEVER FORGET that you too can be a duck

hello burgers are a type of soup follow me for more life hacks i will not be accepting questions at this time

if u are celebrating today please remember to do so with two (2) extra quacks

🔔🎵🔔🎵🔔🎵🔔🎵🔔🎵🔔 quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack 🔔🎵🔔🎵🔔🎵🔔🎵🔔🎵🔔

@sharkedupdown u missed lots of ducky huggles so here's the back pay 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

YOU CAN IMPROVE YOUR SLEEP by raising one of your feet and tucking it into your feathers (in this tweet, you are a duck)