¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I like using twitter because none of my friends use it

I just saw a quote that said, “You worry too much for someone who figures it out every time” and I feel like I’m not the only one who needs to hear that.

You all are very young, but there was a time when we used to spend money buying ringtones, and now I’ve had my phone on silent for like five years.

Thanos was right, half of yall need to go

Charging a fee to pay a bill online when there isn't a way to pay in person or with cash is a scam.

next time gas go under $2 ima put some in the freezer

i dislike eating out with people who give waiters a hard time

New concept: reverse retirement do whatever I want until 60, then get a shitty desk job for the rest of my life

Dear Apple, Leave my Brightness wherever tf I put it. Thanks

Everything is urgent in corporate except your promotion.

being a girl is trying to guess wtf is going on with your body 3 times a week

Your doctor went to medical school for 12 years. The person denying your claim went through a two-week training module.

Made it to Friday but at what cost? Monday is literally in 20 minutes.

Just cut off a student driver. welcome to the real world nigga

$20 in the tank ain't twentying.. Lord help us

Ain’t nobody on the radio more than that top dog law nigga.

At this age missing trash day will ruin your entire week

Be careful. People do not like you.

NO FLY ZONE 🚫 #WorldBaseballClassic

They ain’t want smoke with Bebo coz that man was gonna go yardssss im pisseddddd