President Matt

Excellent question good sir as jokes are always better when fully explained. We here at the Jarvis Account do not do POLITICAL jokes. We do not care who you vote for or why. We do jokes about the way people TALK about politics. Because it is unhinged. Political talk today is characterized by CATASTROPHIZING. Your enemies will put you in CAMPS. Democracy is ENDING. Every election is THE MOST IMPORTANT ELECTION OF OUR LIFETIMES. Scott Pelley being sacked isn’t the mere natural outcome of calling his new boss a murderer and generally acted like a petulant dickhead in front of God and everyone - it’s the END OF LIBERAL MEDIA AS WE KNOW IT just like it was when Acosta and Lemon and a million other replacement level talking heads were shown the door. This particular joke is a form joke we invented maybe a decade ago to describe the way we catastrophize everything on social media. Believe it or not it actually predates the famous RUTHKANDA FORVER post which is just the most notable of the Woke Kid genre of tweets. We most recently used it a month ago to poke fun at conservatives who were having what we considered to be somewhat humorous meltdowns about Spirit Airlines going out of business as if all their mothers were dying as opposed to the much more boring reality of the fact that a shitty airline went belly up. As Canada will once again not have the Stanley Cup on its failed terrorist state soil, I hope that this joke explanation will provide some solace and edification. And of course there’s always next year.

Like everyone, I was shocked by police letting Henry Nowak die because they heard "racism", but not surprised. I grew up watching two tier policing in action. And it's all on their website. The whole system is set against white people. And it must be smashed!

The same police force who handcuffed Henry Nowak and called him a liar as he died, did this to the people protesting it. Nobody can say there's no two tier policing and judiciary in the UK. The whole world sees it.

@MikeMinogueABMD Commies never break with the Party.

Massachusetts voters already did their part. They overwhelmingly approved giving the State Auditor authority to audit the Legislature. Beacon Hill’s response? A “transparency” bill that narrows the audit, lets legislative leadership control key parts of the process, and blocks courts from forcing compliance when records or interviews are denied. That’s not transparency. That’s politicians writing the rules for their own scrutiny. So what can we do? Find out how your State Rep voted on H.5469. Call or email your Rep and Senator and ask one simple question: “Why did Beacon Hill narrow the audit authority voters approved in 2024?” Then ask them to oppose any version of this bill that blocks real oversight. This is not left vs. right. This is voters vs. a government that wants to audit itself on its own terms. Watch the vote. Share the names. Replace the politicians who protect the system over the people.

I had pell grants, SMART scholarships etc. still forced into student loans and with a 140 IQ had to attend a state school which was barely afforded. While foreign nationals enjoyed expense free higher education. Won't even educate our own people for the good of the Republic. If I ever get into a position of authority free merit based higher education.

@MikeMinogueABMD If true, makes @MassGovernor not only a terrible leader, but kind of a horrible person too, no?

The Federal Scholarship Tax Credit could transform education for Massachusetts students. My wife Renee and I helped create this program because we know the difference it can make for students. Yet Maura Healey refuses to opt Massachusetts in. This shouldn't be about party politics. It should be about putting kids and families across Massachusetts first. As governor, I'll always choose the people of Massachusetts.

@EricLDaugh @readwriteblue Ted Lieu is another liberal just trying to be relevant when he’s not

Let me categorically Debunk this utter rot. @sainsburys. I am a poultry Breeder. The hens that lay white eggs (Amberline/White Star) DO NOT have a lower carbon footprint. Yes they eat a bit less and produce roughly the same amount of eggs as the Brown egg layers (Bovan/Lowman/ISA Brown) but they live shorter lives, are prone to dying suddenly when startled, a flighty and nervous and because they live shorter productive lives (12 -18mnths) vs brown 18/24mnths (both commercial farmed), you have to incubate more which is increased (Electricity/gas costs) and their eggs are not the same quality. I breed and keep 20+ different breeds, including: ISA Brown hens and White Stars. All my hens are 100% free range, Not a single barn kept bird, I have ISA browns that are 5yrs old and still laying beautiful Brown eggs, I have not seen a White star live beyond 3yrs and certainly none have laid eggs past 18-24mnths. White stars Lay themselves to death. They are slender birds and because they dont eat a lot, it drains their personal vitality to keep up laying the eggs you want to sell because of the nonsensical lie that they are "More Carbon Neutral" You want to know about eggs, come talk to someone like me, Don't rely on some hairbrained imagination of a buyer who's trying to squeeze the profit margin for a few extra pennies at our expense and to the poor hens detriment.

@DHSgov Can confirm. We have Signal messages claiming that the detainees didn't actually complain.

@MassDailyNews Hiding an event they’re so “proud” of is right on brand for dems who “are not backing down.” 😂😂😂

@MassDailyNews Who’s paying for the police details?

@MassDailyNews @ferdinandmunro Democrats love to waste tax payer dollars on foolish nonsense.

@MassDailyNews Libs know they have nothing to offer materially/on a class basis so waste all their time on shit like this. It appeals to the suburban rich but no one else. Should be easier to defeat in a city!

@MassDailyNews Since when do PUBLIC officials do things in secret? So then this proves these fools do not serve the people.

@MassDailyNews The FBI should know about this. The cops should be arresting, not shielding it.

@MassDailyNews How does one know where it's to be held if it's secret?

@MassDailyNews ROFL! Dumb libs seem to be hell bent on holding this event for a small number of extremely deluded idiots, who are not sure what sex they are!

@MassDailyNews Who’s paying for this mental illness party ?