mud

what do u mean i “need” a 401k? i have triple d tits?

@softcarrotcake They need to put this in the next edition of the DSM

I perform funeral rites in my head for every dead animal on the side of the road I leave no one unburied

libra moons be like I think I need to find a way to balance the balance

shelling out for a new phone and then losing all of my drafts is way fucking worse than the library of alexandria getting burned so jot that down

pronouncing pizza like ibiza

I have debilitating adhd but when I’m on adderall I become both an unstoppable force and an immovable object

👹🗡️🦭 (me vanquishing my demons)

I could not imagine owning a ford fiesta let alone driving around in it

I never smile at McDonald’s it is very serious to me

me when I walk around the house in a beautiful gown and a ghost slaps me across the face twitter.com/cakeblanchett_…

mother trucker dude that hurt like a butt cheek on a stick

Wearing platform Uggs and yoga pants makes me feel like a beautiful Clydesdale horse

that was some wise shit young padawan

taking an afternoon adderall and teaching myself how to speak high valyrian

IT’S NOT A SHELL PHONE IT’S A SHELL E-READER SMH

Head is an animal

at catholic retreat learning how to be good parents etc 🤍

Israel is weeks away from eradicating an entire population and we still need to talk about whether reposting from an account called “Fredward” sends the wrong message. A lot of you follow this guy. He would not admit that Israel is committing a genocide. Fuck it. I’m done

seeing my tweets and not liking them is just one more fucking thing i’m adding to the rico case

This is why I catch them instantly