Analytics Plant

me whenever i lose in fantasy sports

Dianna Russini press conference this weekend:

12 years ago the Browns GM knocked up his Capologist and the Browns own internal investigator did nothing to report on it because he was too busy scouting a college quarterback's birthday party attendance. Where's the accountability for this?

Kohl's store managers in Las Vegas with Cousins and Mendoza coming to town:

@megsknowsball Vlad Jr contract extension

i got baseball tickets

Dr. James Andrews looking at the 49ers roster

Seahawks fans right now

@DSzymborski This is quite literally the perfect award for me

I could give out the Dan Szymborski Award for Baseball Achievements in the field of Baseball Excellence in Achievement, but it wouldn't be perceived as a honor, so the honoree wouldn't care. But HoF induction does have that perception, though not perfectly.

so is Andruw Jones going to give his spot in the Hall of Fame to Donald Trump or what

This is a my bad, guys. The address I had on file for the MOU was from my work back in the 1990s and was actually Dante Bichette's address. You will all be pleased to learn that we have updated the address in the system and I had the intern create a new SOP for the process.

I continue to absolutely rack up banners. You're welcome Philly.

NBA GMs trying to impress Ja Morant when they trade for him:

Trade news: The Baltimore Orioles are acquiring right-hander Shane Baz from the Tampa Bay Rays for outfielder Slater de Brun, catcher Caden Bodine, right-hander Michael Forret, outfielder Austin Overn as well as a Competitive Balance Round A pick, sources tell ESPN.

Thats the most Sam Darnold play that has ever Darnold

@adamlevitan Just another week of legendary work on the Solo Pod #Pulitzer

@AnalyticsPlant haha my god, what have i done

The internet: "Any life tips?" @adamlevitan:

@SheaSerrano 5 min blitz?

beat someone rated 1463 that’s my highest-rated opponent win ever 😭😭😭

what’s a rap album that will never leave your rotation something you’ll be listening to at various points for the rest of your life

@Ihartitz @SigmundBloom Pau City

@SigmundBloom Paucity. Great word

With the paucity of depth at RB and WR and number of TEs outside of the top 10 drafted that have hit this season, don't think you're crazy if you are putting someone like Kincaid/Warren/Gadsden/Pitts/Goedert in your flex spot this week. Maybe even Fannin or Juwan Johnson

Kyler Murray getting benched is wild.

these 2 absolutely racing each other in a career concussions contest