Jamie Johnston

Nothing checks your ego right before a single friends group vacation than having to buy your first pair of cheater glasses so you can read all the books you packed.

@TurnerOnAir Fuck, no. They will love you. Book my bachelorette in next. Except I won’t be getting married. So it’ll just be you and I getting tipsy in the hot tub.

I’ve been asked to bartend a poolside bachelorette party. Question: do I need to get ripped and rock a speedo for it?

Booked a solo trip the week AFTER March Break. Feel supreme parent guilt. A friend reminded me that it’s heathy & important that my kid see me doing things independently, for my well being. I KNOW this but I NEEDED to HEAR this. Sharing in case anyone else needed this reminder.

So awful 💔💔💔

@Morbidful A much better way to be remembered/honoured than most ways we do it in North America.

In 2020, 16-year-old soccer player Alexander Martínez was shot and killed by a cop in Mexico who confused him with a criminal. Before laying him to rest, his friends decided to let him score one final goal by laying out his coffin and rebounding the ball against it.

K wait, you saw this recent post from @BayshoreFred right @gbyersfish ?! Those fucking sweaters…why does this look like an SNL sketch?! 😂

@DangerOnAir Fuck, even our show talked about it (not going to lie) from the angle of “how is this news and why is everyone talking about it”. No better. But it’s what we’re told to cover…”what are people talking about?” 🙄

I love how a fast food outlet can reintroduce what is basically dog food in a bun, slathered in goo, and every media outlet is practically jer*ing off over it. What are the chances a small business (restaurant etc) could get the same free advertising? Zilch. People are 🐑.

I am not embarrassed to admit that I sometimes enjoy wearing fake nails. I do need to acknowledge how terrifying it is to lose a nail. Did my dog eat it? Is it in the salad? Is it caught in my hair?

My soul misses living near the water. Ironically, I live in the city of 300 lakes…none of them compare to the accessibility of Georgian Bay.

“I’m going to let you go, I know you’re paying long distance for this.” - My grandmother, 4 minutes into every phone call, still to this day.

Doing a huge 10-year overdue clothing purge. For every 20 items my kid rescues from the donate pile, there are a ton of other items she crushes my soul by rolling her eyes, & telling me, “no thanks, it’s just a bit too early 2000’s”. Excuse me while I take my Lipitor and go die.

@DomSimardFM @RuPaulsDragRace It’s a crapshoot. I got a good one.

@GymClassJamie @RuPaulsDragRace Okay well NOW I want kids.

I’m in the hot tub, watching @RuPaulsDragRace and my kid just brought me out a plate of pierogies with a side of sour cream and cheese. Just over here living my best life if anyone is wondering. #bestkid

13 y/o: “I love chardonnays.” Me: “WTF….” (For the record, we’re dogsitting a “sharpei”.)

I don’t understand how more people aren’t talking about this documentary (second season just came out.) WHAT IS GOING ON?!?!

Said I was turning over a new leaf this year but I just contemplated an empty Amazon delivery box before deciding that yes, I will put that in the “keeper” box pile.

My teen: SKINNY JEANS ARE FOR LAME MILLENNIALS. How come stores, not normally at the forefront of fashion, are only selling boot cut/wide leg? Maybe I’ll figure out how to pull them off again, but for now, give me a rack of distressed skinny jeans, signed a millennial mom.

I was shocked one day to receive a strange request from legendary guitarist Dave Navarro, of Jane's Addiction and the Red Hot Chili Peppers. He wanted to talk about trauma, and to use my face in his art. What? /thread

@HunterAtHome @BroadcastDialog Congratulations! 🔥

Really exciting news to share with you guys today! Thank you so much to @BroadcastDialog for this award, it really means a lot. And huge thanks to YOU, my friends and listeners for all your support over the years! Read more : canadianradioawards.com/best-on-air-so… x.com/sonic1029/stat…

@Dalby @BrockOnAir @BroadcastDialog Way to go guys!

Incredibly proud to find out that @BrockOnAir and I were chosen by @BroadcastDialog for this wonderful award! Thanks to everyone who listens to our daily nonsense, you're as important to the show as anything else!