Hemingway The Dog Mom

@BaddCompani Dear Assholes, Greedy Jackwagons, Entitled Brats and Douchebags, Last chance. Run. Cut a deal. Stop shredding phone records and consuming paperwork. We had them a long time ago. Forget covering it up. We already know. We are not kidding. Fuck you very much, The Good Guys

Two more weeks, everybody drink

I don't think my day can recover from "I thought it was me as a doctor." Let's call it a wrap.

In Clarendon: “The Salt Line? Is that a coke bar?”

Big deal. Doris has been teleporting herself to the Waffle House since 1972.

I can't promise getting a fishing license will make you more attractive, but at this point what could it hurt

The advice dispensed by the eponymous subject of the Kenny Rogers song "The Gambler" is, at best, "no duh" guidance. But then he dies! I would've been pissed that the guy drank all of my booze and caused me to get caught up in a police investigation.

“While spacewalking I realized something, I used to think I was scared of heights but now I know I was just scared of gravity.” ― Artemis II Astronaut Reid Wiseman

“why is the moon a she??” because NASA said so you little bitch

Thank you @NASAArtemis crew for confirming the earth and moon's beauty from all angles 🌎🌕 #ShotOnNikon Credit: NASA

I’ve really been enjoying Chris Hadfield’s commentary on how Hollywood has painted the narrative in film that space travel is so grim and sad…and he was like we have the time of our lives up there actually

When the conservative American Legislative Exchange Council met in December, directors of two Leonard Leo-connected groups came prepared with a set of pre-written bills that could shield fossil fuel companies from liability for climate change. propublica.org/article/climat…

Billionaire fugitive Roger Ver was facing federal criminal charges until he sought the services of a select club of President Donald Trump’s former personal attorneys who have easy access to top Justice Department appointees. propublica.org/article/bitcoi…

“I felt very uncomfortable that CPS are showing up unannounced and taking two children away from the parents without having a discussion with the doctors,” Dr. Sharon said. “I hope no one expects me not to say something when that happens.” propublica.org/article/child-…

The Trump administration proposed a $68 million settlement that offers no compensation to victims of an alleged predatory lending scheme in Texas. “It’s a slap in the face to the individuals that were harmed,” a former federal regulator said. propublica.org/article/trump-…

One of the most brazenly corrupt events in history will take place tomorrow when Jared Kushner represents the U.S. in critical negotiations with Iran to end the war while he accepts millions in fees (and billions in investments) from the Saudi gov’t which has been lobbying Trump to continue the war