Doug Bies

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Doug Bies

Doug Bies

@dougbies

New York Jets fan, poker player, Instagram, Snapchat, & Untappd: dougbies

Austin, TX 加入时间 Aralık 2009
1.4K 关注17.5K 粉丝
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Doug Bies
Doug Bies@dougbies·
I turn hot dog water into ice cubes for house guests I don't like
South Huntington, NY 🇺🇸 English
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Doug Bies
Doug Bies@dougbies·
I establish dominance at Wendy’s by dipping french fries in frostys
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Doug Bies
Doug Bies@dougbies·
Douchebags in pickup trucks with aftermarket loud horns are elite losers
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Doug Bies
Doug Bies@dougbies·
Adults that overuse the term “spooky” are the worst
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Doug Bies
Doug Bies@dougbies·
I like to roll on squeaky toys
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Doug Bies 已转推
么 ꜱ ᴀ ᴍ ꪜ,
么 ꜱ ᴀ ᴍ ꪜ,@kaizen000000000·
The 3 most BOGUS events in human history: 1. The birth of Jesus. 2. The death of Jesus. 3. The resurrection of Jesus. All this effort for a work of fiction, just to manipulate people
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Doug Bies 已转推
Jamie Bonkiewicz
Jamie Bonkiewicz@JamieBonkiewicz·
Maybe they think this is "winning” because they don't know what winning looks like because they're a bunch of fucking losers.
English
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Doug Bies 已转推
sixfootcandy
sixfootcandy@sixfootcandy·
I’ve reached the level of marriage where I don’t even need to speak. I just sigh and my husband instinctively starts apologizing for something he hasn't even thought of doing yet.
English
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Doug Bies 已转推
sixfootcandy
sixfootcandy@sixfootcandy·
My husband and I are having a competition to see who can hide plastic eggs in the hardest spots. Loser has to cook and clean for a week. It’s been three days. He’s currently tearing the garage apart while I watch Netflix. I haven’t hidden a single egg.
English
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Doug Bies 已转推
𝕷𝖚𝖈𝖎𝖋𝖊𝖗
𝕷𝖚𝖈𝖎𝖋𝖊𝖗@LucifersTweetz·
Remember, the worst people you’ll ever meet sit in the front row at church.
English
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Doug Bies
Doug Bies@dougbies·
I enjoy long romantic walks towards extra cheddar goldfish
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Doug Bies 已转推
Jamie Bonkiewicz
Jamie Bonkiewicz@JamieBonkiewicz·
In two days, Christian Nationalists will celebrate the resurrection of a man they would deport
English
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Doug Bies
Doug Bies@dougbies·
It should be socially acceptable to whip bread ends at people you don’t like
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Doug Bies
Doug Bies@dougbies·
Peeps are the New Jersey of candy
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Doug Bies
Doug Bies@dougbies·
Curly fries should all be as long as slinky’s
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Doug Bies
Doug Bies@dougbies·
Burritos should always at least be the size of a titty
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