🤘🏽DaddyStretch™️🤙🏽

I will NEVER live this down lol 23 games later I got myself one for the season boys 🤘🏽@astros @TreyMancini Now I need to get this signed and get my uniform 😎

I’m smoked from tonight 🫩 I need to get to sleep

Having sex is not gone heal no heartbreak.DRUGS …. You gotta do drugs baby

don't put me ina situation where i gotta show you how cold my heart can get

Finally a shower and food 😵‍💫

HOU - Yordan Alvarez 2-run HR (11) 📏 422 ft | 💨 108.8 mph | 📐 27° ⚾️ 77.2 mph curveball (CLE - RHP Tanner Bibee) 🏟️ Out in 30/30 MLB parks HOU (2) @ CLE (0) 🔺 1st #ChaseTheFight

Fuck sex, let's sit on the bed and figure out why you've been lying since I met you

imagine leaving a sneaky link in 1867 and you go outside and your horse is dead

Called my dad to pick me up from this sleepover I didn't like and he said no because you're 35 and that's your wife and kids

@gio__palace Yoshi after meeting the little calacas

Yoshi is Mexican confirmed 🇲🇽🔥

Woke up about to pee myself. Now I just snacked like no other and I’m back in bed for a few more hours 😴

NOBODY HAS YOUR BACK LIKE GOD DOES.

Watching the Astros in 2026: #ChaseTheFight

If you’re not sneezing you’re not seasoning

Lmfaooooo

@PineapplePope3 They’re gone now 😬

@ThatGuyStretch Its this a giveaway or selling

Pull day destroyed me

dont forget to imagine the best case scenario, too

CLINT CAPELA FOR THREE! The first of his career. He was 0-6 total over 11 seasons