Joan Callamezzo reincarnated

@beyoncegarden “What the fuck man?! What’s wrong with you?” I wanna be her BFF

imagine being this obsessed with queer people i’m crying😭

yes very good point after bottom surgery i will still be human, thank you diane

Why do people try to act like Bey isn’t one of the greatest vocalists of all time? My queen is sitting the fuck down and belting out with 0 effort.

@itswords_ I will think about this tweet until the end of Fuckin’ time. So fucking funny.

I respect the moon's unwillingness to be photographed on a phone.

@salajm @_sorrengailll Maybe knowledge would have let you know that it was “ more efficiently”

@_sorrengailll we could, but now we could do it quicker and more efficient

"There's no way you can write a ten page paper without chatGPT" WE COULD LITERALLY DO EVERYTHING THAT EVER HAPPENED IN HUMAN HISTORY WITHOUT CHATGPT WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.

@annhybri “Who is this?”

I need a nonchalant response to “I hate you”

How the fuck is Jackie Tohn not cast in every show ever? I’ve never in my life seen someone play an asshole so effortlessly and hilariously. Icon.

straight men: orgasm gay men: orgasm lesbians: orgasm straight women: honestly it’s no big deal i’m just here for the cuddles i don’t mind it’s okay that i don’t orgasm sex is sex 😭❤️ we’re all trying our best it’s not his fault

It’s legitimately astounding how Giancarlo Esposito casually surpasses basically every other actor alive with just a quick sentence or expression. The man is…. Iconic.

This has a clinical name. Revenge bedtime procrastination. And the ADHD version runs on a completely different mechanism than the neurotypical one. A neurotypical person stays up late because they want more leisure time. The ADHD brain stays up because it spent every drop of dopamine it had on executive function during the day. Sitting in meetings, managing transitions, filtering impulses, remembering the thing you were supposed to remember. That burns through dopamine the way sprinting burns through glycogen. By 10pm the tank is empty. But here's where it gets counterintuitive. The exhaustion is physical. The dopamine deficit is neurological. Those are two separate systems. Your muscles want sleep. Your prefrontal cortex is starving for the stimulation it was denied all day because it spent 14 hours on task-switching and impulse control instead of anything that actually felt rewarding. The phone at midnight is the brain trying to collect what it's owed. Low-effort, high-stimulation content. Scrolling, short videos, rabbit holes. The exact profile of activity that delivers dopamine without requiring the executive function you already depleted. The sleep researchers call this a "self-regulation failure." It's closer to a debt collection. You borrowed against your own reward system to function all day. The bill comes due at midnight. And the brain will not let you sleep until it gets paid.

@Malia_rox21 @ThrillaRilla369 It’s important to me that every human is paid fairly for the work they do. Why is that a foreign concept?

@WDion17 @ThrillaRilla369 Why is this so important to you? Have you been judged wrongly or unfairly? Servers do agree to the payment terms and received an hourly wage. Is there something you are trying to get from me in particular?

You're at a restaurant the bill is $195. How much are you tipping?

@Malia_rox21 @ThrillaRilla369 And when you’ve made mistakes, who was the arbiter of whether or not efforts were made? Who decided if you should still be paid for your work?

@WDion17 @ThrillaRilla369 Yes, grace should be given if efforts are made to do better. No one is perfect.

@TweetHearts72 @ThrillaRilla369 “Let them eat cake” lmao

@WDion17 @ThrillaRilla369 Cry. Cry Joan.

@Malia_rox21 @ThrillaRilla369 What I’m asking is if you work a salaried job and you mess up one day, do you think your pay should be cut? Or are people allowed to make mistakes?

@WDion17 @ThrillaRilla369 Yes. What you make is a direct reflection much of the time I waited tables and can tell you how well you do matters. Should it not?

@LeonaughtGaming @Tinker565 @ThrillaRilla369 Do you think “signing a social contract” means you literally signed something?

@WDion17 @Tinker565 @ThrillaRilla369 I didn't sign shit. I do what I want. Dont like it? Dont let me back but I wont come back anyways. More should be like me. Businesses would change quick

@lachancenaomi27 My therapist knew that I lost my insurance, and continued to see me pro bono for over a year, because “ we can worry about money later. You NEED therapy right now.” she’s the most important woman in my life apart of my mother, and yes, you need a new Fuckin’ therapist

I’ve seen this new therapist 4 times and every time we talk about my dog dying. Today I said we were looking for a new dog and she asked if I’ve had a dog before. Should I find a new therapist

@LeonaughtGaming @Tinker565 @ThrillaRilla369 Dining out is also not mandatory. But you signed a social contract when you did that. Do you take a flight and refuse payment because there was turbulence? Child.

@Tinker565 @ThrillaRilla369 0% because i do not believe tips are mandatory and avoid services for that reason. Do good get tipped.

@TweetHearts72 @ThrillaRilla369 “Hi. My piece of shit boss needs you to leave so I can afford to eat.” Stunning.

@ThrillaRilla369 As a restaurant owner I tell them look…. You don’t expect much. We don’t tip by the percent. Some tables are $5 some are $3. Some are less. Some are more. It’s up to YOU the server to get them served and done. You need the table for the turnover. Don’t let them become furniture

@Malia_rox21 @ThrillaRilla369 Do you get paid less if people think that you didn’t perform as well as you should have?

@ThrillaRilla369 Depends on service and the restaurant. Anywhere between $40-80.