vita snackville-west

2 parts orange/mango juice 1 part espresso. magnificent

if you get on the train with a book you're intending to read but look at your phone instead? instant stomachache curse. venmo me $20 to lift it

@hausofdecline Clavicula

we need a trans clavicular. more than anything we need a trans clavicular

saw the rib remodeling surgery and the only thing I thought was "I bet I can DIY this with some hammers"

@NYCMayor ty mr mayor now please make it an ASP holiday. do this and i will drive the snakes out of nyc

Happy St. Patrick's Day, New York.

can't believe they robbed us of the timothee reaction cam during that unbearable "and theater, and ballet" comment

woke joe rogan: "he did what? jamie pull that up. did you say fucksaw?"

i moved to brooklyn with a fuckass haircut and a dream. a dream to get a second fuckass haircut

@christapeterso does he smoke weed? that can suppress dreaming in some people

Have any of you… never, in your life, had a dream? My cousin is over and reports this.. is he a changeling?? what is going on

i grew up in high point hearing rumors like "mandatory steakhouse etiquette" and other bizarre nouveau-riche stuff. years later i cornered one of its students who was high on shroom chocolates at an of montreal show who, to my horror, confirmed everything was true

went to a gay wedding for halloween which meant balancing wedding attire with a halloween costume and i think i did a pretty good job

@lemoncarcass unfortunately she adores him

you can’t convince me she didn’t join rhoslc so she could divorce this man

@necromantiic i mean, decent, esp. if they're new. maybe not worth it if they ship from Turkey

@GutturalSounds $75

Thought about it

@PATRICKHENRYUSA patrick everyone at the church is really worried about you. please come home

@GutturalSounds And you could never stand in his shadow

sliwa is a cute old crank and i too feel the desire to stop by his front yard card table for biscotti and stories or to help pair his car bluetooth to his phone, but it's important to remember he also fucking sucks apnews.com/article/guardi…

Attempting a rewatch of this masterpiece entry in Evil Cinema Canon

@smelen96 it's at this point i give up and go to anna's archive

broke down after much effort and bought an e-book of a book i need for research, and now they want me to make an account on another site to access my e-book. i am #teedoff #tickedoff

i think zohran and kamala's dads should get together and go bowling

@sofiabuffgf it's kinda fucked up they don't sell leather in the gift shop. just the ethical slut pins and tom of finland postcards

disappointed in my followers because none of you suggested the leather archives and museum

mushroom guy at the farmer's market told me he had a dream about a car powered by people bike pedaling and i said "like a pedal pub?" and he didn't know what that was so i showed him a picture on my phone and he was so tickled by the idea he took a picture of my screen