40 oz. Miller High Life

@PWCommenter Put mozzarella sticks under 2 and you’ve got the 96 bulls of apps

Who won

@BarperHryc97755 I******* M********* on the #beev is unprecedented

DELCO Final Boss

@Foodacriss My dad stranded his boat on the sandbar once and I was completely convinced we’d end up on qualified captain for a week because we were a big group flying like 4 different college flags

Was just reminded I’ve been featured on Live:PD (my fault) and QualifiedCaptain (dads fault)

Those jelly roll divorce memes are killing me

@TortoiseCosta Cody James

Made this list the other day. These brands all have the same vibe to them. Anyone want to add

@BentonSwathford Golf. Brews. Peter Millar.

One of the gayest bios I’ve seen in a while

Yall remember when Brian got Stewie pregnant. What the fuck was Seth McFarlane’s problem

Blaming this loss on ESPN overplaying Country Roads

@TGvngsh You need a summary execution if you watch pregnant porn

@hardedgeball Can’t perform with a torn ACL but you definitely can perform being pregnant…

Is getting pregnant the porn industry equivalent of tearing your ACL?

@AnalogJuul Pornhub’s version of the Drose ACL tear

@hardedgeball Gabbie Carter retired in her prime after she got pregnant

They said we weren’t gonna beat Kentucky either #BELIEVE

Lowkey sold this conversation down the road but we are moving in great directions #wearesoback #LFG

White people when TOOL comes on

@hazardpounder Have you tried turning 21 yet?

Mom said if I use my fake at this restaurant she’s snitching to the server. I am being raised by nazis.

@MattSumf 100% chance this was taken inside of a squatted truck judging by that crown bag

Gay son is on a generational run

@Devinnealburner Sounds like the #RentDue

Reload and beat troy Tuesday, but you gotta leave Brodie at the hotel