Beth Matuga

Sounds like you married an eight year old

if you put your fucking BACKPACK in the overhead storage bin on a FULL TRANSCONTINENTAL FLIGHT you deserve to be put on the no-fly list forevermore

My fav malapropism

This is Finley. He's just met the new tiny hooman. Knows babies are fragile, so he's using the softest, most careful paw boops imaginable. Pure gentleness on display. future best friend guardian angel confirmed

I will never understand the rationalization of cooking the ground beef BEFORE the onions. Onions first!!

Honestly the biggest obstacle to adapting Children and God Emperor of Dune is trying to find someone who’s got the juice to play Leto II.

Watched this for the first time, and unsurprisingly found it incredibly charming and funny, especially for John Leguizamo’s dynamite performance. Familiar road trip beats and very 90s but in a good way.

So, I’ve finally perfected my Bolognese sauce. It’s the finest I ever made from scratch.

Watched The Thomas Crown Affair, the remake with Pierce Brosnan and Rene Russo, last night for the first time in years and it felt like a transmission from an alien planet. 10/10.

I had a buddy in college (prone to tall tales) who told me that there were secret sensors embedded in the pavement and if you didn’t pull your car up far enough the light wouldn’t turn green. He was right?? All these years I thought it was just a fantastic tale he told me.

I had a buddy in college (prone to tall tales) who told me that there were secret sensors embedded in the pavement and if you didn’t pull your car up far enough the light wouldn’t turn green. He was right?? All these years I thought it was just a fantastic tale he told me.