Jamie Stapleton

@fesshole Is this a @porksmith fess from about 15 years ago? 🤔

Been a collector of synths and music tech for 30 years. My studio takes over two full rooms of the house, much to the annoyance of my wife, who believes that I need it all to make music. I recently had my first hit record which I made on a train, using only my laptop.

@fesshole Pub landlord here. Likelihood is it’s us, or one of our staff team you’re doing the favour for. Thanks Fesser, you’re one of the good ones!

In pub toilets if there's a mess on the seat from the previous person I always worry the person after me will think I'm the dirty sod who did it. So I give it a thorough clean, plus I feel as though I'm doing a favour to the cleaners.

@PaddyM04882466 @fesshole That’s weird, I did too. I think it’s the ‘mate’ at the beginning of sentence 2

@fesshole I'm reading this in an Aussie accent but I'm not sure why

Ended my affair when his messages switched from telling me the dirtiest things to what "cute" things his sons had said. Mate, I'm not their mother, I don't care. Don't bring boring real life into the affair bedroom.

@MrJamesMay I sell these in my pub. Customers regularly refer to them as ‘Cheese Crack’ and I definitly have used the old ‘first pack free’ selling model. Once they’re hooked, the reeling in is easy.

A mate and I have just tried these. Do not be tempted. This is a gateway cheese.

@baddantakes 🎶Learn to work the saxophone I, I play just what I feel Drink Scotch whiskey all night long And die behind the wheel They got a name for the winners in the world I want a name when I lose They call Alabama the Crimson Tide Call me…🎶

@anon_opin Nah. The Scarecrows’ Wedding is JD’s finest work. In standard English. But The Gruffalo in Scotts, that’s a thing of literary perfection!

The Detective Dog' is Julia Donaldson's finest work. It should be more widely known than 'The Gruffalo'.

@Ginger_Tucci @AnExpatWife Mine is just algorithm anomalies. For some reason, twitter thinks I really really really like the footballs (I’ve never been into football)

What’s the weirdest thing that’s happened to you on this hellsite this week? I’ll start. Someone has an account that purely responds to @AnExpatWife and I telling us children are a blessing. Know what else is a blessing? Long lies, silence & all my money to myself.

@5tuuuu @anon_opin Bit strong! You do realise that nonce and ponce aren’t interchangeable insults right?

The greatest trick that craft beer ever got away with was convincing people that 330ml is an adequate home serving even for beers under 6% abv - fuck off with your tiny tins.

@Pragjag @anon_opin Cloudy and sour really is nothing new. 15ish thousand years of brewing history. Only the last century and a half or so have beers been almost exclusively clear and not sour.

@anon_opin I think the biggest trick was persuading people that beer could be sour and cloudy.

@anon_opin Craft bar owner here. Mostly it’s 440ml cans these days. Has been for yonks. Only the supermarket sell out brands do them in 330s. Want good craft? Stick with the indies.

@chetanv82 That’s awesome mate!!

Just brought a holiday home in Mumbai 😍 Now eating lettuce for the rest of 2024.

@Ginger_Tucci Immaculate bit of telly that episode! 😘👌

The Christmas episode of The Bear is without doubt some of the best viewing I’ve done in years. Exceptional.

@Ginger_Tucci You clearly know your onions! My absolute favourite!

I fancy a Gibson, I need to get off my arse and make it.

@PSB_HQ @TomSleepInertia I know you’re mainly a kit player, got anything up your sleeves?

@PSB_HQ @terl_music where are you based these days? Or Martin Neil? He gets about a bit though, but was London based last time we spoke. He has sooooo many drums!!! 😳

@PSB_HQ Yeah they’re awful. Most stuff with a stagg badge on it is :/ no joy from Wembley drum centre? @drumwembley gonna be honest though, not every plastic head is ‘bad’ the meinl ones ive played were ace! They had regular plastic heads

@PSB_HQ Also, in 20 years of working in a drum shop and doing perc workshops, I’ve never seen a trad goat/calf skin doumbek or darbouka. Only ever plastic or Remo fiberskin type things :/ hope you find one x

@PSB_HQ Have you tried reaching out into the Turkish/Middle Eastern/N-african perc community? I just did a google and came up with these guys. Worth a shout? arabicdjlondon.com/zaffa/

Don’t think much to the new prodigy merchandise

@BeardedGenius Obviously I meant *pub landlord 🤦‍♂️

@BeardedGenius Hi. Pup landlord here. Occasionally we see this done with a bag of crisps, AND a packet of peanuts, AND a bag of pork scratchings. We call this ‘pub tapas’.