New Year, (In no way a) New Dave

And yet I love you all

@TrackRivals UPS might strike in August, you could start delivering for them and be a quadruple striker

@jeremypolson "You ever look in the mirror first thing in the morning and think 'That can't be accurate.'" --Doug Stanhope

My iPhone doesn’t recognize my face in the morning and frankly neither do I.

@morgan_murphy I live in KC so if you want to pick me up along the way I can chip in for gas...😄

anyone wanna take a 32hr road trip?

If I could attend any sports event in the foreseeable future it would be this

@ShannonAber I know you live in Ohio and have tattoos but please don't get this one reddit.com/r/ATBGE/commen…

I liked the reading I did hear (Cats of Ulthar-- my favorite Lovecraft short). You did a great job!

@podsothoth I'm a fellow FOD and Lovecraft stan. Heard your ad on @GreatestTrek and binged all your discussion eps yesterday. I skipped the readings only because I've read all the stories several times. Great pod, I subscribed

@TheRomanNick loved the song parody at the end of the Metro ep. You are the Weird Al of YouTube car channels

@MaryDealing1 Cookies look good!

@MaryDealing1 "Oatmeal Date" sounds like something Boomers might complain about younger generations: These kids today don't even know how to have a proper Oatmeal Date!

Dinner break at the lab, enjoying some of my wife's incredible baked goods: oatmeal date cookies! super moist, chewy, and flavorful.

@RikerGoogling Have you tried pushing it and popping the clutch?

starship won't start

@swd2 I'm already bald so best to keep umbrellas away from me

I consider shaving my head and hitting people with an umbrella at least once a day

Evergreen tweet

@ChristenP A sexy muppet Bible movie would R O C K

@Dave_Blogger that would be like someone watching one of my dirty plays and then hiring me to direct a movie about the Bible

knee/ back hurty so I watched 3 movies I haven’t seen tonight: Meet the Feebles - what the fuck lololol… directed by Peter Jackson, a muppet show with sex, drugs, a scromiting bunny, a horny walrus, and Heidi the Hippo w/ huuuuuge tits who goes on a murderous rampage

How much does it cost to feed these shoes? Is vegan shoe food cheaper than an all meat shoe diet?

1958: Only the FA Cup final is broadcast on TV. 1988: Live football is broadcast once a week. 2018: Football is on TV every night. 2048: Any time anyone in the world kicks a spherical object a video is automatically downloaded onto your brain chip. You cannot opt out.

Proposal: if a cop is involved with a shooting and they "forgot to turn on their body cam" they should be immediately charged with first-degree murder.

For those non car nerds who follow me, a Nissan Frontier is a Japanese truck, not an American Pony Car. AI strikes out again. #aifail

@AlexSchmidty @KatieGoldin @SIFpod Very excited by the news. Katie is amazing, you guys will make a great team

@Dave_Blogger @KatieGoldin @SIFpod 🙌

Do you like podcasts? About interesting stuff? Well, @AlexSchmidty and @KatieGoldin are together again for the first time on @SIFpod! This is going to R O C K