ꓘ.🄷🄾🅆🄴🄻🄻

@Twins I felt that thwack in my soul. Nothing beats baseball.

We’ve got your Carlos Correa moment right here. #TwinsWin | #MNTwins

Guys, I drank a Topo Chico and did not burp AT ALL.

Wordle 699 1/6 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 today is the BEST! New Dave record out, kicking ass at work. Happy Friday y’all

@HrlTrashPandas Reroute and Kadi enjoying the davenport lounger.

Big tilt tonight vs @BabycakesHrl tonight! Game 1: TBD Game 2: Wiffle Jesus Howl Toonces Sayles Guy Wiffle Jesus Kadishak

In attendance: @HRLToonces @khow 2022 National Wiffle Nickname of the Year winner Wiffle Jesus Pitching: at least two of those three.

Ummmm it’s accumulating mother f’ers

More runs in the top than pitches in the bottom. Damn. @Twins

@flea333 Just shit right at US bank stadium, the Vikings always take a shit right on their home turf anyways.

More rock star glamour: walked to Target to get nail clippers and nose hair trimmer. Employees were right on me asking for selfies and telling me they love me. Two minutes later I get hit with a major urge to take a shit. They tell me bathroom is downstairs, I go there but ten people in line, I’m about to soil my trousers. I go to employees and plead, please can I use employees bathroom they say no employees only. I run across the street to some cafe and ask to use bathroom (on the way there a guy waiting outside tells me I’m an asshole for not stopping to take a selfie with him) the cafe lady threatens to call security on me for politely asking for bathroom. I made it by the skin of my teeth to a restaurant a few blocks away. Back to hotel to practice trumpet.

Vanilla ice cream is an excellent substitute if you run out of coffee creamer. 🍦☕️

morrisnilsen.com/obituary/mario… Love you Grandma 💙🌺🌸🌼🌻

Anyone going to the RHCP/ Strokes show? Thinking about flying solo cause I GOTS to see the Strokes!!

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! @surlybrewing

The other night, I shot a stink bug off a vaulted ceiling with a mini nerf blaster. A most thrilling Tuesday evening. 🪲🔫 #nerfornothin

It’s extremely upsetting I can’t find a Frackers jersey anywhere on the internet. #keepingitbrockmire #brownandgold

@timheidecker Batteries not included

Minnesota drinking game: 1 beer per car you see in the ditch on your commute home. We can play all week! You can keep a tally on your frozen windows!

Bro insisted on 🫰 in’ this 📸 @dealsfromthevalley #fbf ‘19? @ Soundset instagram.com/p/CoyJnhBM_d_/…

Ohio👀@whitenoisefilm