elaine

if someone likes your writing, chances are they will like a lot of the other stuff you like and share. our writing reflects our values and tastes. it's not possible to like someone's writing without being drawn to some part of their ethos.

heard this on a podcast and it made more sense than it should: “he looks like he either wants to murder you or interview you.”

stress changes our perception of time. with everything else constant, if something is weighing on me mentally, i always feel like i’m busier and have less time.

summer is almost over, and there are still so many “summer books” i want to read.

adults are just as emotional as children. they’re just better at hiding it. (i needed to hear this.)

we've internalized an expectation that relationships are fluid and impermanent bc of how easy it is to enter and leave each other's lives. this impacts attachment systems: we're primed to look for signs of incompatibility and anticipate abandonment before it happens.

what we read is like what we eat. it tells people so much about us.

@justintchiu interesting. agree that indecisiveness is sometimes warranted and not necessarily bad

@lainewrites or reframe indecisiveness as strong decision making after taking a chance and getting more information. indecisiveness just means there were no obvious choices previously

noticed i have a tendency to convince myself to go along with something that i have some hesitation about, and then later, my concerns grow, and i end up backtracking and feeling bad for being indecisive. i need to learn to trust my first instinct.

@ByAshJones usually involves other parties

@zencephalon yes! sometimes it works out unexpectedly well. probably just need to get better at understanding what's driving the hesitation

@lainewrites On the other hand do U have examples of things U felt that hesitation about but ended up fine or great? I agree that trusting that unease matters and I think it can get calibrated to the point of avoiding everything

convinced therapy makes you a better writer (both fiction and nonfic). the more you can write complex, emotional layers, the more hearts and minds you move.

i’ve found this to be comforting when going through heartbreak

in love and in life, trying is the only thing that matters. you can't guarantee that you will love someone forever, but you can commit to trying when things get tough. it's the best promise you can make someone and the best you can receive.

this might be obvs to ppl who read/watch a lot of romance, but i'm just now realizing that the genre is intended to be fantasy/escapism bc it usually depicts relationships that are so over-the-top in passion and intensity that it just doesn't seem realistic or even aspirational

after taking photography, i’m appreciating movies in a totally new way. i’m noticing good composition and where the camera is focused and seeing bokeh everywhere.

loneliness as disconnection from self: it's not about having a busy social calendar or lots of friends—it's about spending your time in ways that make you feel like your truest, most vibrant self. sometimes, that means saying no to more things.

LLMs made me realize that my whole life, I had been asking A LOT fewer questions than I wanted to be asking.

seeing animals does wonders for one’s soul. a reminder of the pleasure of simply existing under the sun ☀️

used to ignore my feelings and spend a lot of time interrogating if someone's actions are acceptable. took me a while to realize that in most cases, there's no clear-cut measure of correctness. cultural norms, personalities, preferences vary widely. what actually does matter is how their actions made you feel.

NYC has "are we dating the same guy" fb groups SF has "are we employing the same guy" twitter