The Presbyterian Parsnip@PresbyParsnip
BREAKING: Saint Andrews fires back at the PCA, formally demanding their communion bread recipe be STRICKEN from the Book of Church Recipes.
“If we can’t excommunicate nonmembers, we CAN excommunicate you from the bread of the only true elect,” an elder reportedly stated. “These covenants cut both ways.”
Rumors are swirling that the Church has upgraded the sacramental wine to The Macallan 30-Year-Old Sherry Oak Scotch since there are no rules now, though this has not been confirmed.