fakesevitz

Just became that guy who talks to random moms in coffee shops about my house reno. I’m like pre-annoying strangers before I meet them.

Latest house renovations! Look at what we did! Incredibly excited about what we did here! #FurbInTheBurbs

The Return of Buff Daddy. Not meaning this: sevitz.com/2005/08/the_re… rather that I will be having a child and have many floors to buff.

Back from the gym, checkin out the guns. Going to look super when finished and oiled. #superbintheburb

Plerns plerns plerns.

@wompkin FUCK YOU, FUCK THAT POLL, AND FUCK EVERYONE FOR NOT BUYING APPLE!!!

@sevitz @PrivatePatto true!

@cianw what do you mean the MIDDLE of Memento? I thought we were doing first/last 10. Please explain the joke in a non-condescending manner.

@mgsmith57 @PrivatePatto I know what you're all doing. At least, I suspect something is happening. I don't know what... but I don't like it

@PlanetPatto Did you order the mock? DID UOU ORDER THR MOCK?!?

@PlanetPatto but if someone else is amused by something and I'm not, it makes me feel stupids and THATS MEAN OF YOU.

@PlanetPatto @mattjair @PrivatePatto @wlmager I hope I am not amusing anyone because then I will feel like everyone is laughing at me :(

@wlmager are you saying that he is literally removing urine from my bladder? Please explain what you mean and why you are saying it.

@mattjair @sevitz @PrivatePatto PARODY ACCOUNTS ARE NO LONGER ALLOWED, IT HAS BEEN DECREED BY @wlmager

@wompkin my theory: this rage was inspired by that @yearofelan thing.

@wompkin I think you're allowed IF you amuse more than a dozen people. THATS THE RULE.

@wlmager don't get mad at ME just because Vine doesn't work. I *did* warn you.

@wlmager what happened broseph? Did someone finally push you too far? Come nestle in my beard.

@wlmager the scariest thing is that @fakefakesevitz is even REALER. And only amused about two people.

@wlmager I keep telling you, @sevitz is the parody, I am the real deal!