Alex M. Kintner

Being the youngest of 3, I was never privy to the lone maraschino cherry in the Libby's Fruit Salad.

@AlexKintner3 🙋🏻‍♂️ It is easier putting them on before than after putting on your shoes. I also put my underwear on before putting on my pants.

Who the hell puts their socks on first?

How I run when I gotta pee

@AlexKintner3 Because you have not started the 4th one yet.

I just lost 3 hours watching these scuba guys scrape barnacles off propellors of these megaships. It was strangely satisfying.

@AlexKintner3 And? The minute he gets rid of them, he will need them. Leave it alone. 😉

My dad had the same 8 pieces of lumber in the garage for 35 years.

@davetulsa I rest my case

@AlexKintner3 Dad used to have this GMC custom deluxe pickup that had wood side panels along the bed He removed them, but kept them in the garage for decades because “that’s solid lumber”

This might be the year that I realize that 198 riding mower in my shed is no longer "good for parts".

I have to work with a "Scrum Master" and I have to stuff my hands in my pockets so I won't do air quotes.

I don't think I've bought shoelaces in 8 years.

Still turn the music down when I can't see the house numbers.

🎙- Me, When you finally hit that one post 📫 ♊️😈🎭 💯

Do all the ghosts speak English?

Can you imagine trying to ask Alexa to play Jim Croce?

He tried to make a Frosty at home but it just wasn't the same.

Floppy discs really weren't that floppy.

Why do I have three full drawers of USB cables?

If someone gives you one of these, don't take the gold necklace off.

Is the duck a vampire?