
I dont know how and why im still here.....
I was in such a dark place, 1 bottle per day somethines another on top of other stuff.... I somehow ended up with the worse thing that ever happened to me with nurse cutting my clothes in a trauma bay... And I sent myself there... Surgery later and pysch ward to a program for im assuming like 4 months and then i did 2-3 in another one and now im in the final stage of long term....
I mean i was in such a dark place, I know I didn't do this alone and I had so much support in so many avenues I didnt look and although some are gone now I will always remember what youve done for me...
man its sad... because i almost cried when i seen and signed my work hours for the bi weekly chart the first one was 38/40 hours because i had therapy,I DID 40 HOURS OF WORK NEARLY IN A WEEK. Not streaming either....It was a moment even with no self esteem I was actually proud of myself of in that moment and the second one was 28/40 because I had 2 half days and a day off.... I mean wow.. To go from where i was to where i am now is a miracle it's nothing short of a fucking miracle... I am so grateful
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