Matthew Brain

Wow,for a moment there I thought I was directing Doctor Who a whole month before I was born🙀

@JonathanPieNews So all of the right letters but not necessarily in the right order...

It's 'you're'. Also, I'm not sure 'bullshite' works as well as the more standard 'bullshit'. The 'e' softens the impact. I hope I've given you some constructive feedback here.

@PaulVick138203 If he actually had any integrity he never would have had anything to do with them in the first place.

Do you think if Richard Tice had any integrity he should offer his resignation as Reform UK Deputy Leader?🤔 Repost after voting please.

@RebecTV Isn't every day?

Beautiful day to sit inside and watch Jonathan Creek with ur bunny

@helloKi30596224 They don't. They want everyone to be as miserable as they are.

I live nextdoor to a pair of Reform voters. They are a pair of the unhappiest, most unpopular and least successful people I have ever met. I'm not sure how thay expect Reform to improve their lives.

@glitteringstorm The one who travelled through time and space in a blue box.

Who's everyone's favourite New Who Doctor Who? #DoctorWho

@theliamnissan I suppose the ultimate mash up would be to become Alan Audi.

I love how Elon can't ban me because it would cause such an uproar. Besides, I'd just come back as Camry Diaz™ or Tom Celica™

@meishato Suddenly he didn't have a leg to stand on.... Oh wait... Nevermind.

my bestfriend has a prosthetic leg and one time on a packed bus an old man told her to give up her seat. she said no. he started going on about “youth these days have no respect” so she literally took OFF her prosthetic leg and handed it to him like “since you need it so bad” and suddenly he didn’t need the seat anymore 😭

@DisaffectedPod Why did I read this as if it was written by the cat?

My boy Shredder is getting very old. He's nearly 19, and after being a fat boy most of his life, he's getting bony now. Has early stage kidney failure, and some dementia. He's not entirely "gone in the mind," but he gets confused a lot, and wants to be near me or on me all the time. So he gets whatever he wants now. I bring him food wherever he is, on my bed, on the couch. He gets a heated blanket wherever he wants it. If he wants the food on my plate, then he gets to share it with me. As long as he eats that's what matters. I love him and it's sorrowful to know he won't be around much longer. I'm gonna love him up until then.

@ok6ixx He just wouldn't be any good on a steakout.

When my dad was a teenager, he accidentally started working for a restaurant that was a front for the local mafia. He flipped burgers for a semester and then, when he wanted to leave, one of the members pulled a gun on him and said he couldn't. "Oh, fuck off," said the guy's superior. "Really, man? He just flips burgers, and he's not even good at it. Let him go, dumbass." and that was my dad's brush with organized crime

@Feargal_Sharkey A good carp is hard to find.

My daughter just sent me this, Facebook Marketplace, a £10, she thinks I should I get it? 🤔

@josh_snares Is it part of the story 'The Abominable Showman!'

help!! i’ve become a missing episode of dr who!!!

@josh_snares Have you tried getting them from hole foods?

had a doughnut today and it wasn’t very good two bad doughnuts in the past fortnight… why has god forsaken me???

@Dr_TheHistories Maybe he was just taking the long way to California.

In 1938, American pilot Douglas Corrigan became famous for one of the most unusual flights in aviation history. Corrigan had repeatedly asked permission to fly solo across the Atlantic from New York to Ireland, but U.S. aviation authorities denied the request, saying his aircraft was not suitable for such a journey. The plane was a modified Curtiss Robin, which Corrigan had rebuilt himself. After the rejection, he filed a flight plan that claimed he would fly from New York to California. On July 17, 1938, he took off from Floyd Bennett Field as planned. Twenty-eight hours later, however, Corrigan landed in Dublin, Ireland. He told officials he must have accidentally flown the wrong direction due to a navigational error. Whether the mistake was genuine or not remains a matter of debate, but the story made him a national celebrity and earned him the nickname “Wrong Way Corrigan.” #drthehistories

@josh_snares Maybe you should get a second opinion...

guys i just got diagnosed with “hot doctor who fan” disease

@DrMatthewSweet Can we call fivers ironsides now then?

Just put Daleks on the £5 note.

@Rainmaker1973 Possibly the best way to find out your parents are cousins...

Boy's parents picking him up from school dressed as Superman and Supergirl.

@mjfree Two tRump supporters.

Is there anything with a lower IQ than a Trump supporter?

@BrittanyinTexas Harrison Ford has much more experience being the President of the United States and even when he turned into a big red angry toddler still managed to do a better job.

Harrison Ford on Donald Trump: He’s a “son of a bitch.” “I don’t know of a greater criminal in history. He doesn’t have any policies, he has whims.” And when Indiana Jones speaks, people listen. 🎯

@Loverism__ Well a third hand would probably be really useful...

This is the world liberals want

I've just signed "Back the National Commission Amendment" - Will you support the campaign too? actionstorm.org/petitions/ncer… @OpenBritainHQ @action_storm