🦆Lady Quacky-Duck🦆

Trying out the new blue place, same @, come say hi!

A MESSAGE FROM JIMMY BALL 🦌💙 Dear AFC Totton supporters, It is with a heavy yet grateful heart that I announce my departure from the club. Over the past four years, I have given everything I could to AFC Totton. Together, we’ve shared some truly special moments and achieved a great deal that I will always look back on with pride. I want to sincerely thank you all for the incredible support you have shown me and the players throughout this journey. It has meant more than words can express. I firmly believe the club is in a much stronger position now than when I first arrived, and I take immense pride in having been part of that progress. Thank you for everything. Goodbye for now, Jimmy

CLUB STATEMENT - JIMMY BALL 🦌💙 Dear Loyal Supporters, It is with regret that we must share the news that our First Team Manager, Jimmy Ball, has agreed personal terms with Torquay United Football Club and will be taking up their vacant position as First Team Manager. Since joining the club in 2022, Jimmy has built a formidable reputation, guiding the team and the club to two promotions in just three seasons. His achievements will forever be recorded in the history of AFC Totton, and the club will always be grateful for the energy, dedication, and passion he brought in helping lead us to the highest league position in our 140-year history. On behalf of the Board of Directors and everyone associated with AFC Totton, I would like to sincerely thank Jimmy for his outstanding contribution during his time at the club and wish him every success in the next chapter of his managerial career with Torquay United Football Club. Assistant Manager Scott Rendell with Director of Football Dave Wright, will take interim charge of the First Team until further notice. I have no doubt our supporters will continue to give Scott, Dave, and the squad the same unwavering backing you have always shown, proving once again that AFC Totton truly has some of the best supporters in the game. Up the Stags! Kevin Hebenton Chairman AFC Totton #GoStags🦌 #WeAreTotton

@jimmytwhu @InsideLucysHead Yes, but not much parking

@InsideLucysHead Is there even a weatherspoons in Uxbridge … Alluah Akbar 🥸

A Group of guys, all turning 40, discussed where they should meet for lunch... Finally, it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because the waitresses had big breasts and wore mini-skirts. Ten years later, at age 50, the friends once again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally, it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because the waitresses were attractive. The food and service were good, and the beer selection was excellent. Ten years later, at age 60, the friends again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally, it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because there was plenty of parking, they could dine in peace and quiet with no loud music, and it was good value for money. Ten years later, at age 70, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally, it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because the restaurant was wheelchair accessible and had a toilet for the disabled. Ten years later, at age 80, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally, it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because they had never been there before.

@Michael_JDean @WhiteNoise1879 Didn't Chelscum have an onsite barbers' that was binned off when a new manager came in and wanted players to stop poncing about?

I can't see a single PL player ever using something like this. They are closer to their barbers than they are their mums. #ffc

Remembering @JaneyGodley She was right.

@qikipedia Would you like to meet my carlt, Leonard? Aaarggghhh

Apart from ligers (lion–tiger hybrids) and tigons (tiger–lion hybrids), there are also lion–tigon hybrids called litigons; lion–leopard hybrids called leonards; leopard–jaguar hybrids called lepjags; and lion–lepjag hybrids called lijaguleps.

Are you safe from Duo this year? #Duolingo365

No you don't

It’s giveaway time! RT for a chance to win a gorgeous A3 print of your choice by the fabulous @GailMyerscough and I’ll pick a winner on Monday. Visit gailmyerscough.co.uk for more lovely goodies at affordable prices. Good luck!

It's very strange, but the name "Gakpo" makes me feel physically uncomfortable. Sort of nauseous and shuddery. I'm sure young Cody is a lovely chap but I'm quite glad we're not acquainted.

It’s nice watching US elections. It’s like when someone else’s kid is screaming their head off in a restaurant and its mum and dad are getting all stressed and you just think “glad I don’t have to deal with that” and you can just kick back and enjoy the bread sticks.

HARRY WILSON YOU HERRROOOOO 🖤🤍

Just manhandled a bona fide rockstar out of my way. But if you stand between me and the ladies loo, that's what's going to happen!

To brighten up budget day, I am giving a set of these Fabulous Mr Benn badges away. To be in the bowler hat, all you have to do is retweet this tweet. I'll choose a winner this time next week. Good Luck!!

Fucking hell Mel B is unbearable on this episode of #Buzzcocks

Very sad to hear of the death of @PhilRickman yesterday. I'm just finishing a reading through of all his books, including some new to me, and can heartily recommend them all.

I sat in a meeting making soft owl noises today, if anyone wants to know my current state of mind.

Genuinely sulking at the #GBBO result

@kenbrwn1 I suspect she knows...

#onlyconnect Numberwang Armstrong and Miller? How dare you!

It's all about priorities.