Dos Urracas

@_timwiddowson Two cities of culture. 🤣

@1862_TwoPies Yeah Seville & MCR very similar 😂☀️🍻

Port Street Beer House my favourite non local pub… looking glorious in the MCR sunshine. Rude not to sneak in a belting Beak x OSO DIPA

@_timwiddowson @GreatNorthPieCo Enjoy👍🏼🍺

Well if you’re flying outta #Manchester you may as well get some local sustenance. A pint of Boddies (first in years … it’s started to be brewed again) & a fantastic pie from my fave pie meisters @GreatNorthPieCo Set me up a treat.

Nope. Still profiteering in my neck of the woods. Quick as lightning to put prices up, no urgency to bring them back down again🤬 bbc.co.uk/news/articles/…

@CambridgeUtdFC So how is the sending off a punishment? Surely a sending off is supposed to have a consequence? Your first choice keeper gets sent off so you bring in a replacement??!!🤷🏻‍♂️ seems wrong to me.

We are pleased to announce the emergency loan signing of Jack Walton. 🤝 cambridgeunited.com/news/jack-walt…

@KRennicks40 We heard it time after time but seen no evidence of it. Pathetic toothless performance today. However, it’s not all on the players, he continues to pick Grant & play 1 up top on his own, reacts far too late to situations, he has to own this too.

All season we’ve heard that the players understand what it means to represent the football club… So that helps explain why it was deeply embarrassing to watch us is in our biggest game of the season from the 2nd minute onwards. A really, really hurtful, disastrous watch.

@stema_steve @Official_NCFC Yes bud, injuries played their part but today was beyond toothless. He knew what their tactics have been all season pump it high into the box win headers and win 2nds. We needed an outlet to keep the ball at times but the set up just allowed wave after wave. Lge2 next yr defo.

@1862_TwoPies @Official_NCFC Understand, but surely injuries have had a part to play in this. And stupid suspensions. Play offs it is and probably Chesterfield to turn us over

@Official_NCFC experienced manager v Rookie. Outplayed, outclassed, outfought. We couldn’t cope with the predictable high ball. Do we actually do our homework? Slow predictable, backwards ball at 3-0 down. Complete embarrassment today Notts.

@Official_NCFC Iorpenda for me but Nessy’s 2 goals deserved it too.

Man of the Match shouts? 🤩

@Official_NCFC @Piethagoram Why did he not start today? He should be in starting 11 next week without a doubt.

Jayden Luker's back in the goals 🔥 A lovely way to wrap up the points 👌

@htafc @magpies_history Looks much better in black & white than blue and white.

Wishing Tom Iorpenda a very happy birthday! 🥳 Enjoy your day, Tom! 💙 #htafc

@RachelReevesMP What you giveth with one hand you take double with the other. The working English person is much worse off. Complete Spin.

Minimum wage rising 📈 State pension increasing 💷 Two child limit abolished 🏡 Child poverty falling 📉 Rights at work strengthened 💪🏻 Labour promised change. We are delivering change. theguardian.com/commentisfree/…

@Official_NCFC @MuddyPatchPie Don’t understand it. Not punished during the game, Lino had clear view & tv cameras didn’t see it. So who decided this after the game? Managed without him earlier in season but injuries and suspensions list get longer. We’ll soon have more players out than available.

Statement: Alassana Jatta

Dear Prime Minister & Home Secretary, I hope this letter finds you well, fully caffeinated, and in possession of a calculator. I’m writing with what I believe is a modest, fiscally responsible proposal. I understand the Government is offering up to £40,000 to certain individuals to voluntarily leave the United Kingdom. First of all — bold strategy. Nothing says “strong borders” quite like a cashback scheme. Now, I regret to inform you that I am, in fact, a fully tax-paying, law-abiding British citizen. I know — awkward. I appreciate this may disqualify me from the premium exit package, but I’m willing to negotiate. I would like to formally apply for £35,000 to leave. You see, unlike some applicants, I haven’t broken any laws to get here. I didn’t arrive by dinghy. I didn’t require processing, housing, or legal appeals. I’ve actually been funding the whole operation through PAYE for years — which I believe makes me a loyal shareholder in this enterprise. Given that you’re prepared to offer £40,000 for someone to depart voluntarily after entering illegally, I feel £35,000 for someone who’s been here legally all along represents excellent value for money. Think of it as a “Buy British, Get One Gone” discount. For £35,000 I will:    •   Leave quietly.    •   Not require a press conference.    •   Not demand a diversity officer to wave me off.    •   Even carry my own suitcase to the airport. I may also tweet a polite thank-you note on departure, praising the efficiency of the scheme. Frankly, it feels like I’ve misunderstood how incentives work in modern Britain. All these years I thought obeying the law, paying taxes, and contributing to society were the winning strategy. Turns out the real pro-move is to arrive unlawfully and wait for a loyalty bonus. Who knew? While British families are juggling rent, energy bills, and the weekly food shop like contestants on a dystopian game show, it’s reassuring to know the Treasury has located a spare £40,000 per head for voluntary goodbyes. May I ask — is there a points card? Ten years of National Insurance contributions and I get a free exit bonus? If so, I believe I’m overdue. In the spirit of fairness and fiscal responsibility, I am not even asking for the full £40,000. I’m trimming £5,000 off to help balance the books. That’s the kind of responsible budgeting I was raised on. If successful, I promise to:    •   Leave via a scheduled flight (economy is fine).    •   Not stage a protest on the runway.    •   And refrain from re-entering on a small boat to see if I qualify twice. All I ask is equal treatment. If departure is now a funded career pathway, I would very much like to submit my CV. Yours in hopeful relocation, A slightly confused taxpayer

Anyone else thinking Walsall boss might be sacked before Sat?

@Official_NCFC @marktatter Newish ref, FA were always going to back him. Was it a clear and obvious error? Debatable. His foot was high but didn’t warrant red imo. However, FA were never going to overturn it. Need Palmer & AJ back ASAP.

Our appeal against Lee Ndlovu’s red card has been unsuccessful. We felt we had strong grounds to contest the decision but were swiftly informed that the forward must serve a three-match ban.

@FabrizioRomano Said it before and I’ll say it again. Give 10 pens in a premier league game it’ll never happen again.

🚨 Michael Carrick on wrestling at set pieces in Premier League: “I think it's gone too far. The success of set-pieces, putting so many bodies close together, has made more teams do it”. “In terms of the game, it doesn't feel like we've got that balance right”.

@DeadlineDayLive Stop holding and shirt pulling in the area at set pieces. Just give 10 pens a game, it’ll soon stop.

🇩🇪 German referee Patrick Ittrich has proposed a number of potential rule changes in football: 1️⃣ For a tactical foul in midfield, award a free-kick 17 metres from goal. How many of those fouls would we see after that? 2️⃣ If a player rolls around three times and calls for a doctor, bring one on — then make him wait on the touchline for three minutes. How fast do you think he’d get back up? 3️⃣ If a player verbally abuses the referee, send him off for 10 minutes to cool down. Go for a quick cycle to stay warm before returning. There’s something to learn from handball there. 4️⃣ Why is a referee being surrounded by 10 players after a decision? For me, bang, bang, bang — three red cards. Play seven vs ten. That would sort it out. Do you agree with his changes? 🤔

@DeadlineDayLive Stop keepers going down ‘injured’ so the manager can disrupt the flow of the game and make tactical changes. Another player should leave the field of play like an other injured player when medical assistance is given. They are very rarely actually injured.

@TranmereRovers Offside, clutching at straws there eh lad?

🗣️ Andy Crosby spoke to the media after our defeat at Notts County: shorturl.at/TtEKc #TRFC #SWA