Alan Pardew

I said to Andros, if you enjoyed fighting relegation last season then this is the place to be for the next 12 months.

I apolgise to West Brom but it wasn’t my fault - it was those #NUFC fans who forced me out and have tarnished my career.

Shit.

I would like to rule myself out of the running for Ipswich Town job.

This is all out of context. twitter.com/alexrobnewton/…

No parties? You’re doing it wrong Rafa lad. At least rob a sombrero. twitter.com/chrisdhwaugh/s…

Shit.

Can’t wait to holiday next season with Arsene. Magaluf, lock up your daughters.

I know how Arsene Wenger feels. One talented manager let down by his players - I’ve been there. I’m there now but us legends of the game will always prevail.

I getting this one in early - I’m blaming the snow for this weekend’s defeat. It was the beast did it.

Eating ham.

Today hasn’t gone to plan. I blame the travel in midweek.

I’m shocked at Gareth. At the training ground we call him James Milner - we clearly misjudged him.

Wait. When they told me they wanted me to manage the biggest team in the North East - I thought they meant Bilbao, Spain. twitter.com/DailyStar_Spor…

I just hope the deal can be struck in the next 24 hours. I do not want to miss this. #MFC

I've always enjoyed Vic and Bob, Parmos and James Arthur. Perfect recipe wouldn't you say? #MFC

I'm at Celtic Park today scouting the SPL because it's the same standard as League One. That's where Norwich will be heading under me. #NCFC

Just waiting on Donald Trump's take on the fight.

Sitting waiting by the phone. It still hasn't rung yet. Arsenal board must still be busy emptying Arsene's locker.

It's been a tough few days. I can't even fall asleep on the tube in peace.