Secret Agent Randy Beans

Before we get to the Nolan Arenado bashing (and I get it, I see the data, I see the rough swings) let’s remind one another how Eugenio Suarez started with the #Dbacks and then how it ended. Geno was almost DFA’d twice. We’re only on Game 15, folks.

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Chuck Norris doesn’t talk… his kicks do the talking

The spin doctor is in! Check out this limited edition spinning bobblehead in my shop at chuckforeman44.com

Mental Health Experts Confirm Sunny Day At The Ballpark 1000 Times More Effective Than Antidepressants buff.ly/YVzVpIP

I guarantee your kid will never forget this.

A guy goes to City Hall to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?" He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee." "OK, have you ever been in the military service?" "Yes," he says. "I was in Iraq for one tour." The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment." Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?" The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles." The interviewer grimaces and then says, "Okay. You've got enough points for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. You can start tomorrow at 10 a.m. and plan on starting at 10 a.m. every day." The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m., why don't you want me here until 10 a.m.?" "This is a government job," the interviewer says. "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that."

@lady_valor_07 14 here.

I've been to 2, you ?

In 1994, someone found a Masters Green Jacket at a Toronto thrift store for $5, not realizing it likely belonged to Horton Smith, the first Masters winner. It sold at auction years later for $140,000.

This is one of the sickest Larry Fitzgerald cards of all time as long as you don’t look at the back 🤦‍♂️

OK we officially have a new nickname for James McCann

THE #DBACKS BULLPEN HAS ALLOWED 5 ER OVER THEIR LAST 25.1 IP. THAT IS AN ERA OF 1.77. SORRY (but not really) FOR THE ALL CAPS. #Dbacks win.

The @Dbacks come back from 4 runs down and win the opener in Philly!

We just want to take a moment this Friday afternoon to say thank you to all of our customers. Your support means everything to us, and we’re grateful to serve such amazing communities every day. We hope you have a great weekend. Cheers! #FridayFeeling

This one is about to go crazy. Michigan 2026 National Champions Limited Edition Bottle Pre-sale is now live! #GoBlue 〽️ (LINK IN BIO) Limited to 1,500 bottles. 6-year aged Kentucky straight bourbon.

I can’t believe the Phillies still have to wear these horrible jerseys

@MrAzSports I think Nelson

Sooo someone’s going to the bullpen… who?!??

@Hoopss One more reason why the WNBA is unwatchable.

“I’m too valuable to be missing the playoffs every year.” — Angel Reese, on why she allowed the trade from Chicago to Atlanta

Congratulations to @ domjonas on winning the Charles Woodson signed 1997 Legacy Michigan jersey featuring “1997 National Champs” and “1997 Heisman” inscriptions. Thank you to everyone who entered and supported @woodsonwhiskey.