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Me trying to get to big Tesco on the Wrekin retail park

the shower is the alternate dimension where I realize I'm low on shampoo but as soon as I step through the curtain I'm transported back to this dimension where all my memories are wiped like in severance and I won’t remember i’m out of shampoo until im back in the shower

@MSE_Deals @MartinSLewis please assist with this money grabbing company

Complained to @Wowcher_Apl regarding a voucher for a bird experience. The Shropshire Falconry centre couldn’t offer a date before the expiry date (April) & now Wowcher will only give me a 50% refund for the voucher? Can’t speak to an agent only a bot. 😡😡 awful customer service

Well @123Flowers_ are a floral disgrace! Imagine being told to care for them properly and that you should wait for them to bloom? How do you wait for dead flowers to bloom? Company needs closing down. Same review repeats itself ! Avoid at all costs #totalscammers

Me wine-drunk putting on a private show for my cat at 3 AM

Him on FaceTime: you’re so Beautiful Me:

Just need a pish gals 👀

Short weeks are the absolute longest weeks 🥱

Cocaine bear 2 looks shit

The redemption of New Balance needs to be studied

me after being dramatic and realizing it’s not that deep

the dentist immediately after asking me how my day was

Can’t be bothered

🤣🤣🤣 twitter.com/Idiotatworks/s…

@JEDtheRunner @VOXI_UK Service must’ve crashed I’ve just ordered mine J xx

@VOXI_UK Are they really “sold out” already or has your service crashed?? I missed out last month because of issues

DROP HAS LANDED - AND IT’S SWEEEEET!​ ​ We’re giving away 30,000 Letterbox Sweets packages and one of them could be yours 🍬That’s Palentine’s Day sorted. ​ ​ Who will you be sharing yours with? Tag your bestie in the comments 🫶​ ​ #palentines #VOXIDrop