Paula

What the takeaway driver sees after turning up at my address.

My mum gave me the “don’t drink too much” chat tonight before I went out. I’d like to say at 32 that I don’t need that, but I think we all know that’s not true.

Honestly @duolingoUK, this is terrifying

I cannot tell you how much my heart sank. Peter Ustinov? On Christmas Day? Outrageous.

It’s that time of year again 🙃🎄

@MartinBoath Sugababes tho…

Absolute bam fest the same weekend as the orange marches. Glasgow a no-go zone.

@MartinBoath Wait until it turns back on and your desktop background is a U2 album

Massive fan of my Mac just forcing itself to shutdown in order to do software updates.

Can’t park there, mate.

@youngliam14 @NoContextBrits Beautiful

@NoContextBrits @Anderson30Paula

Someone made a Greggs in Minecraft.

As soon as the first slice of bbq steak hits my lips, I completely forget the massive tantrum I threw trying to get the thing lit 🙃

Last night the team @_IF_Studio completed the Kelpies 5km to raise funds for @BrainTumourOrg. It’s not too late to donate for a fantastic cause! justgiving.com/fundraising/im…

@jamesbowness800 told me not to captain Salah this week 🙃

I'm running a 5k race in March with the @_IF_Studio team to raise money for @BrainTumourOrg. Here's the link to donate, if you'd like: justgiving.com/fundraising/im…

just learned about the iowa husband calling competition

Excuse me?

I cannot eat a cherry tomato without chopping it in half and I think this is why.

This is Gary McKee. Today, he will run his 365th consecutive marathon in 365 days. The distance between London and Perth is 8,991 miles. Gary has ran 9,563 miles this year. And he’s also got a full-time job. That is insane 🤯

Merry Christmas everyone, enjoy your day but enjoy it by being…. 🥳 🥂🍾

@MartinBoath Correct.

@Anderson30Paula The conversations people should be having on Christmas Day.

If someone says ‘Fergie’, do you think of:

@blainrooney Merry Christmas Blain 👠